PARSHAS LECH LECHA

Hashem commands Avram to get up and go. Avram didn't know how, when , why, where, for what...but he went. So possuk dalet says VAYELECH AVRAM...VEYELECH EETO LOT...AVRAM WENT... AND LOT WENT WITH HIM... then, right in the next possuk, we have VAYIKACH AVRAM ES SARAI ISHTO...AVRAM TOOK SARAI HIS WIFE. 

I once heard a question on this from Rabbi Zev Leff, which I'll reiterate.

Avram went. We got that. Why is he suddenly leaving again in the next possuk? Ok, so maybe he forgot something that he went back for. Maybe he left something on the stove. Maybe he forgot his passport. Ok, these things happen.  But, the possuk seems to indicate that he left... HIS WIFE?!? And you think you're spaced out? What exactly happened here? Why did he have to go back for his wife?

VAYIKACH, which means and he took, doesn't necessarily mean that he took them physically. Of course, when he left the first time Sarai was with him. RASHI teaches us that the word VAYIKACH means kachnu b'dvarim- they were taken with words. Along the way, Avram found it necessary to give his wife a little pep talk. They were embarking upon a new path. They were about to begin a new life, full of adjustments, full of difficulties, a lifestyle completely different than what they had been accustomed to. And Sarai, like every human being, needed a bit of encouragement.

A businessman was running toward the subway station. At the entrance to the station, he paused to put a few coins into the cup of a man selling pencils, and then ran onto the train. Thinking again, he jumped back off, went to the beggar, and took some pencils from his cup. Apologizing, he explained that he was in a hurry and forgot to pick up his pencils, and he hoped he wasn't upset with him. "After all", he said, "You're a businessman just like myself. You have merchandise to sell and its fairly priced." Then he caught the next train.

At a social function a few months later, a neatly dressed salesman stepped up to the businessman and introduced himself: "You probably dont remember me and I dont even know your name, but I will never forget you. You are the man who gave me my self respect back. I was a "beggar" selling pencils until you came along and told me I was a businessman."

The gift of speech is something holy. Words can build people up to their ultimate height, or they can crumble them down to pieces. Words are so easily accessible. We all have them. We all use them. But there's one action that we need to practice in order for our words to be positive and constructive, instead of negative and destructive. Get ready- its not easy. There is a dimension to the human being which exists in each one of us, although rusty in many... and that is the concept of THINKING. A famous man once said that "people will go to any amount of effort to avoid the labor of thinking." If that's so, we wont be doing that much building either. With carefully, thought out words, we can easily encourage and convince people to make the right choices and to feel good about themselves. When we "think out loud" and our brain isn't connected to our mouths, we can be manipulating, hurtful, and bring out the worst in people.

Everyone, male or female, child or adult, teacher or student, principal or janitor, rabbi or businessman, parent or sibling...every single person needs a little boost. Everyone needs to be built up. Sarai was in a position where she needed pleasant words of encouragement and Avram recognized that and supplied her with the fuel she needed to go on. He took her with words - with constructive words of comfort and encouragement, he was able to instill in her the confidence she needed for this tremendous change.

Parshas Noach

The Possuk tells us that Noach was a good man. Oh, um, in his generation, that is. What kind of compliment is that? Its like telling someone how young and beautiful they look... compared to my grandmother! This is a back handed compliment. What does the possuk mean by expressing that Noach was a tzadik, but only when compared to the men of his generation? If he had lived in Avraham's time- what would he have been considered?

So Rashi gives two contradictory views. There are those that view Noach favorably, and claim that in a more righteous generation, he'd have been more righteous. Others feel that since his generation was so corrupt, and were occupied excessively with adultery and thievery, and he was a straight man,  comparatively, he was head and shoulders above them. But had he lived with people that were holy and straight, he'd have been considered worthless.

I think I understand the problem. I live in Mexico City, in a mostly secular community. There are only a handful of observant Jews in my neighborhood.  Being the 'Rebetzin' here, I often attend various events and affairs. While very elegant and beautifully prepared, these parties are not quite what Im accustomed to. For example, the smoke filled room, the immodest dress, the mingling of genders, and a racket of contemporary rock music screaming into the room throughout the evening. I usually don't stay long. Although I want to be there to support the host, I dream of  returning to my secure little home- where its only ME and MY people and MY things. My own makom kodesh. Where I listen to MY music and eat MY food and wear MY clothes.
And at this point, the self righteouness kicks in. 

Look at ME, and look at THEM. Theyre partying and smoking and sniffing, listening to  percussion based Latin rap, while I'm baking challah and listening to Yeshiva Boys Choir. (or sometimes even a shiur!!)   WOW!! LOOK AT THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THEM AND ME!

That's the problem. When we compare ourselves to people of a lower spiritual stature, of course we're better!  We follow the Torah and thats the ultimate. I should be comparing myself to my friends in Eretz Yisrael! And my friends in New York! And anywhere where there's a thriving Jewish community, and then ask myself "AM I A TZADDIK COMPARED TO THEM TOO?" Possibly not. I have to look at myself relative to who I am, where I come from, and who I can be. Average isn't good enough. I can be much better. And I can be a positive influence on everyone around me.

Noach worked for 120 years building his boat. Get that- 120 years! And no one- not one person- was brought under his positive influence. Its no coincidence that the name Noach means comfortable. He was just plain comfortable with life. He was content with his spiritual level. He was satisfied with himself. He was feeling self righteous. And THAT was the problem.