One day, when *my sister was a teenager, she walked into *her room and
noticed it was in a state of mild disaster. She decided right then that she
will not make any plans that day until her room is spotless.
A moment later, my
mom passed by and, poking her head in she said to her, “what a pigsty! Please
clean up your room immediately!” She replied in the negative and marched out of
her room.
In just a split second, she went from feeling tremendous desire to tremendous
defiancy and shoulder shrugging. What had changed?
It had become an obligation.
When something goes from voluntary to obligatory, our level of desire and
motivation completely changes.
*names and places have been changed to protect the innocent. #cough
#itsjustphlegm
Many of the
offerings described in Parshas Vayikra are completely voluntary in nature. If
these mitzvot are so important, why isn't their performance obligatory, and if they aren't, for what purpose did God give them?
Human
beings are pleasure-seekers. Most people seek pleasure in careers, vacations, cars,
homes, shoes…and we tend to grumble about obligations as unpleasant
aggravations. We don´t like to be tied down to responsibility.
The Sages
say: "Greater is someone who does a good deed by being commanded, than one
who does so voluntarily." Why? Because when we're obligated, our desire
for independence makes us resistant. It activates the yetzer hara. So if we can overcome that to perform the
good deed, then we're a bigger person because of it.
God made
certain mitzvot optional, because if they were obligatory, performing them
would not be accompanied by the same sense of donating one's time and energy
for the sake of God and would not produce the same result.
The mitzvah
of bringing sacrifices is discussed in such great detail, signifying their importance,
and yet they are only voluntary.
This has taught me two important lessons.
The first
thing I realized is that I will not be inviting any animal rights activists for
Shabbos.
And the
second lesson is the importance of changing my perspective on obligations. Obligations
can be and should be pleasurable and fulfilling. They actualize our potential.
They are the basis of our self esteem.
It may be
difficult to fulfill obligations, but there's tremendous pleasure in accomplishing what has to get done. It´s energizing.
Think of an
example of the tiniest amount of pleasure you get from fulfilling a seemingly
insignificant obligation. Like, returning the extra five dollars to the store
after they miscalculated your change. You leave the store with your head held
so high, you almost end up in a back bend. Now try to imagine the feeling
involved in fulfilling a much greater obligation!
What
determines whether we view obligations as a cause for distress, or as a
delight?
Whether we view ourselves primarily as a
"body" or as a "soul."
Bodies do
not like obligations, because they require effort. The body would rather be on
vacation. The body wants to sit on the couch all day, eating potato chips and
watching Seinfeld reruns.
Souls
thrive on obligations. It gives a sense of importance, dignity, eternity.
We need to
figure out what's really important in life. When we have that clarity, then we're
willing to ignore the body's complaints and listen to the yearnings of the
soul.
That's when we will identify with the
soul's desire to fulfill obligations and feel the satisfaction and fulfillment
it brings.
I will now
go finish voluntarily cooking for my obligation of Shabbos, before all my food
becomes a burnt offering.
Have a
beautiful Shabbos!
Yaffa
