tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6709461843172945842024-02-20T18:15:40.940-06:00Panim YafotWeekly Parsha blog by Yaffa Palti. L'zecher Nishmas R' Baruch Berger A"H.Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.comBlogger92125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-10340548620610118082014-10-02T11:31:00.003-05:002014-10-22T23:28:25.758-05:00 The Best Thing Since Sliced Challah<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Every week, when I bake my challah, my kitchen transforms into a spa. Well, a messy spa, but it becomes a glorious, therapeutic, tranquil place of calmness, lightly sprinkled with flour. And, if you listen closely, you can even hear a soft melody emanating from somewhere. I´m still not sure where it comes from, but I know I can count on it every week. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">The odd thing is, there are no flutes or violins when I bake a chocolate cake or when I roast potatoes. Only when I bake challah. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Why? What is it about those fragrant loaves that cause that transformation?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Baking challah for Shabbos is an entirely different experience than just baking bread or roasting chicken. It is more than just a culinary or gastronomical pleasure- it´s spiritual. Shabbos is the day that connects our bodies and souls; bonding our physical and spiritual selves. And when baking challah with an understanding of that, the entire process becomes elevated and holy. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">But holiness and spiritual pleasures aren´t gratis; they require us to actively create them within the physical world. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">And that is what the message of challah on Shabbos is all about. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">From each batch of dough that we make, the Torah directs us to remove a small piece to set aside for God, and it refers to that act as the mitzvah of challah. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Why is this
necessary? Why can't I have my whole bread for myself? And why am I specifically offering up dough and not, say, chocolate? If I were God, I´d definitely
prefer that you give me chocolate.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Contrary to common belief, the
word <i>challah </i>does not actually mean bread. Nor does it mean dough. The root of the word challah is <i>Chol,</i> which means ´ordinary´, or ´regular´.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">When the
original sin took place in the world, it caused a lot more damage to humanity
than just initiating the concept of clothing. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Oh, wait. Is wearing clothing a bad thing?
After Adam and Chava sinned, they went from a state of nudity, to a state of
modesty. Between you and me, I´m kinda happy about that, especially after having
gone through multiple pregnancies and births...</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">But, the concept goes much deeper
than that. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">The reason they were unclothed in the first place, was because they
were living in such a refined state that they recognized each other as
spiritual beings, without even taking notice of the physical. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">By Chava convincing
Adam to eat from the forbidden tree, and by him listening, thereby going
against the Divine will, they lowered the spiritual level in the world,
bringing humans to become more involved with the external than with the
internal. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">So, suddenly,
there they were- barefoot and naked, and felt an abrupt need to cover up their
bodies.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Human being,
though created last chronologically, is the epitome of creation. There is no
creation in the universe with greater understanding, expression, or any type of
potential than a human being.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">A person
can reasonably live on bread and water alone. Bread is
the epitome, the choicest of nourishment. Therefore, when the choicest of creation
sins, and wants to find a way to correct the sin, the two must connect in some
way.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Contrary to
all the beautiful, romantic paintings of the first man and woman, and all the
story books from that time period where we´re shown a man and woman in need of
a body sculpting class, with overgrown hair and long noses, wrapped up in
leaves and delicately biting into an apple, the gemora explains that the fruit of
the Tree of Knowledge, was actually not an apple, but a grain of wheat! </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">So the way to
perfect the wrongdoing of the epitome of mankind is through the epitome of
mankind´s sustenance. Through bread.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Making and
baking the challah is a mitzvah specifically for women, since woman is the one
who takes the blame for enticing her husband to taste from the tree (insert
chauvinist jokes here), and therefore the correction of the wrong must come
from her. By perfecting the fault, every week, woman is refining the world and
bringing blessing and goodness into it through this mitzvah.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"> The point of removing a piece of dough and separating it as something
holy by using it as a sacrifice to God, is to teach us that everything
in the physical world is created for our benefit and for our pleasure. </span></span><br />
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Not to take
advantage of the beauty in life goes against the Torah philosophy. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"><i>But, </i>beauty
for the sake of beauty, or pleasure for the sake of pleasure, does not have
long lasting benefits. The enjoyment is fleeting. The only way to have true
happiness through the physical is by turning it into something holy, something
real. Taking something that´s <i>Chol</i>, <i>ordinary</i>, and making it
great.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"> Taking the most basic piece of physicality, bread,
but using it to connect to God, is a metaphor for all the other areas in our
lives where we can turn some of our habits into ones which can be more
spiritually focused.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"> When we recite the bracha and remove the piece of challah, we experience a special moment of connection with God, and it´s at that moment that many women choose to pray to Him. But really, the entire process of challah baking is one in which we can be
praying to God for the well-being of our families. I´m going to share with you
the concentration I have and the things I pray for while pouring each
ingredient into the bowl.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">There are
seven basic ingredients in challah. We´ll discuss the significance of that
soon. Below is a very basic outline of my tefillos, purposely leaving it open
and broad to allow anyone reading this to interpret them and integrate
them in their own personal way.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Flour</span></u></b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">. Flour needs to be sifted since it may contain
insect eggs or wood. We do that to keep the good and sift out the bad.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I ask God to
please keep all the goodness in my life, and sift out the bad. Any negative
influences- both internal and external, any toxic people or situations should
be removed from my life so that I can fully experience the goodness.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Salt.</span></u></b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"> This is something extra that we add to food
in order to enhance the flavor. It´s not a necessity, but a luxury. Also, salt
needs to be balanced out perfectly, within proper boundaries. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I ask God to
please provide me with not only necessities in my life, but luxuries, too.
Small things, details, that can add extra special flavor to my life.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I also pray
that everything I do should have the proper balance. Like with chessed, and other
mitzvos, I should have the clarity to be able to do them with proper
boundaries; on God´s terms, and not on my own. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Eggs</span></u></b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">. These are what hold the dough together. They
stabilize a dough. Or a cake. Eggs are also very versatile. You can cook or
bake them in so many different and creative ways. They´re flexible and adjust
easily.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I ask God to
please bless me with stability, creativity and flexibility in my life. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Yeast.</span></u></b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"> This is what causes the dough to elevate, and
to expand.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I ask God to
elevate my soul, and to allow me to make mature decisions. I also ask for
expanded consciousness, to be able to focus on the big picture in life, and to
save me from falling into retracted consciousness, closed-mindedness, which
leads to negativity and depression.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Oil.</span></u></b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"> When pouring into any other liquid, it always
rises to the top. It separates and goes up. It never mixes with other liquids. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I ask God
that I should be successful in everything I do, and rise to the top. That I
shouldn´t settle for mediocrity. I ask Him to give me the motivation and
inspiration to be all that I can be. And, that I should keep challenging myself
in healthy ways to step out of my comfort zone in order to get the most pleasure
out of life by reaching those highest possible heights.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I also ask
that I should have the confidence to stand up for my beliefs, to live with my
convictions, without falling down into societal pressure. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Sugar</span></u></b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">. This is an ingredient that is there for one
purpose only: To sweeten our food. To make it tempting and cause us to desire
it.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I ask God to
make my life a sweet one, and to always give me reason to desire it and live
it. And, that I should have the emotional health to recognize its sweetness and
be grateful for it.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I also pray
that I should have the confidence and self esteem needed to always recognize
the sweetness in other people and be able to judge them favorably and love them
unconditionally.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Water.</span></u></b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"> Water is what turns the lump of ingredients
into a dough. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I ask God to
always give me the strength to take all the little ¨lumps¨ in my life and to
turn them into something substantial. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">To allow me
to take all the unwanted or painful circumstances in my life and to teach me how
to make them positive. To improve that which I cannot remove.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Each
ingredient must be measured proportionately to each other, or else the product
won´t have a successful result. This is also the balance in life; whether in
working on self awareness, personal growth, working on a marriage, raising
children...We need to have an even balance of every aspect of ourselves or of
the person in it. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">We must evenly weigh the physical state, emotional state,
intellectual state, spiritual state, financial state, situational state, and
mental capacity. Seven different aspects of a person, understanding how much
salt they need, how much sugar, when they can be an egg, when they need to sift
their flour...etc...</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">The seven
aspects defining a human being are not the only time we see the number seven
here. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">The challah
that we bake is generally to be eaten on Shabbos. It´s very significant and
relevant that Shabbos is the seventh day of the week, because according to
kabbala the number seven represents physical completion, symbolized by the
completion of the physical world on the seventh day. There are many customs
that we carry out on Shabbos connected to the number seven. I thought of these
one day while trying to figure out what the word ´cholent´ means. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">I know. Don´t
even ask.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">On Shabbos, before
even making kiddush, after inviting God and the angels to come sit with us, we
start off the Shabbos meal with the song of Eishes Chayil. This beautiful poem
about the value and valor of a Jewish woman was written by Shlomo Hamelech,
whose name means Shalem= completion. He wrote it for his mother, whose name was
Bat-sheva= the daughter of seven. And the poem itself is written in order of
the Hebrew alphabet, using every single letter, making the poem
all-encompassing, covering every aspect of life, showing the completion of the
potential of the woman. </span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">Let´s
continue with some of the mitzvos of Shabbos and their gematrias , and we will
use gematria ketana, which is when we add up the sum to get to its final,
single numerical value.</span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span dir="RTL" lang="HE" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">נר= 50+
200=250=7</span><span dir="LTR"></span><span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";"><span dir="LTR"></span> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span dir="RTL" lang="HE" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">יין=
10+10+50=70=7</span><span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";"></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span dir="RTL" lang="HE" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">חלה=8+30+5=43=7</span><span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";"></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span dir="RTL" lang="HE" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">דג=4+3=7</span><span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";"></span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span dir="RTL" lang="HE" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">בשר=2+300+200=502=7</span><span style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";"></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">The mitzvos of Shabbos- candles, wine, challah,
fish, and meat, all equal the number seven.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">I noticed that there are also seven main
ingredients in cholent! (which by the way, actually comes from the word
´nonchalant´. I told you not to ask.)</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">Onion, potato, beans, barley, meat, water and
salt. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">Anything else you add in is extra, according to your
taste. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">This, of course, brings us back to the seven
ingredients in challah and the reason we eat it on Shabbos. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">Shabbos is the holiest day of the week. So, it
seems strange that for a day so spiritual and sanctified, we put so much
emphasis on the physical. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">For example, the very first thing we do is drink a
cup of wine. Wine is as physical a thing that exists! The gemora warns us to
stay away from wine because it leads to sin! But yet, we start off the holiest
day of the week with it?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">And then we have the food. THE FOOD! We cook the
most luxurious, tantalizing dishes, spending more money and time on them than
on any weekday, then serve it in ginormous quantities, in a minimum of three
courses.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">And then...there's the clothing. And shoes. And
shabbos wigs. Expensive and gorgeous, impeccable and immaculate. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">Then of course, we take a leisurely Shabbos
nap...or two...which of course makes sense, since the gematria of </span><span dir="RTL" lang="HE" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">ענג</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";"> is six...so we naturally need
that extra nap...´cuz </span><span dir="RTL" lang="HE" style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">מנוחה</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";"> equals one...so it takes two naps to reach seven :) </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">So, isn't it contradictory to spend the most
spiritual day of the week so completely absorbed in materialism?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">No. Because there is no contradiction between the
physical and spiritual. They go hand in hand. Our job is to take the physical,
elevate it with a spiritual action, and then enjoy every piece of it. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">And that's why, even though we start off Shabbos
with a cup of wine, first we make kiddush on it. We are mekadesh it. We make it
holy. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif";">And that´s exactly what we´re doing by the mitzva
of Hafrashas Challah.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;">May we indeed be worthy of refining the world through our mitzvah of challah. We, the women, are the ones who knead this mundane,
physical dough, but while doing so we elevate it, thereby combining the physical and spiritual
worlds. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria","serif"; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-30859836575516838382014-09-05T16:04:00.000-05:002014-09-05T16:04:11.403-05:00Support The Troops!<span style="font-size: large;">Seventy-four
of the Torah’s 613 commandments are in the Parshah of <i>Ki Teitzei</i>.
Choosing an idea to write about this week was as difficult as shopping
in Marshalls; nice things all over the place, you don´t know where to
look first, and you have to sort through everything to find what speaks
to you at that moment. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Some of the mitzvos this week include the laws of
the beautiful captive, laws governing the purity of the military camp,
the prohibition against turning in an escaped slave, and other laws and
discussions about fighting in war.<br />
With laws as interesting as how
to respond to the wayward and rebellious son, burial and dignity of the
dead, returning a lost object, sending away the mother bird before
taking her young, the duty to erect a safety fence around the roof of
one’s home, the judicial procedures and
penalties for adultery, for the rape or seduction of an unmarried girl,
and for a husband who falsely accuses his wife of infidelity...and a
whole lot more, why have I chosen to focus on war? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> Not because it´s
the hot topic in the world now. This war has no connection to
Iraq or Syria, to the U.S., or to Israel. It has nothing to do
with Obama or to the ISIS.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The war I speak of is one that´s more personal than the
ones we read about in the media. It´s a war in which each
one of us are the soldiers. Or if we´re lucky, even the Generals. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This
battle is called <b>LIFE. </b><br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">In this world, we are in an ongoing war:
our spiritual selves battle our animal selves, our mind fights mindless
emotionality, and higher, broader vision constantly battles limited vision.<br />
Each
time we come to a crossroads where we have to choose a direction; to go
right or to go left, we experience an inner conflict. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Whatever decision
we make will result in some
sort of sacrifice, so naturally we choose the easier one. <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Easy</i> and
<i>Hard</i>. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This set of antonyms, along with its partner- <i>Good </i>and <i>Bad</i> are very often misunderstood and subsequently the cause of confusion and frustration. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">We often connect and confuse the two ideas by thinking
that <i>easy equals good</i> and <i>hard equals bad</i>. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The most practical example disproving this
misconception would be: chocolate cake vs. exercise. The cake is <i>easy</i>...way too easy...but it´s <i>bad</i> for you. Exercise is <i>hard</i>...oh, so
hard...but it´s <i>good</i> for you. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">So, easy doesn´t mean good, and hard
doesn´t mean bad. Sometimes the more difficult the decision is to make,
the more beneficial it will be for us.<br />
We are put to this test, not
just daily, but multiple times per day. In our physical lives, and in
our spiritual lives. I constantly find myself at a crossroads trying to
be victorious over my conflict of wills. <i> </i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>My will vs God´s will. </i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Easy vs
hard. </i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Intellectual vs emotional. </i><br />
And sometimes, the battle is even
more intense, when we make a choice, but the
decision made presents a whole new set of choices, bringing us into the
overwhelming maze of question marks. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Like, choosing to <i>admire </i>instead of
<i>ridicule</i>, or to <i>praise</i> instead of <i>slander</i>, to be <i>independent</i> instead of
to <i>conform</i>.<b> </b> </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">But... the war isn´t over yet. One must choose to <i>admire</i>, but
not <i>envy,</i> to <i>follow</i> but not <i>imitate</i>, to <i>praise</i> but not <i>flatter,</i> to <i>lead</i>
but not <i>manipulate</i>.<br />
Life is an ongoing war. And, like in any war, the winner is the one who stoops in order to conquer.<br />
<br />
<span class="huge"></span><span class="huge">Have a great Shabbos! </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span class="huge">Yaffa</span></span> Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-17712484039704449332014-08-29T16:03:00.001-05:002014-08-29T16:12:46.056-05:00The Neighborhood Watch<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Double Standards. That's what the problem is. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I'm in a big rush so I can't give anyone a ride.... but <b>she's </b>so self centered and that's why she's not offering to take me home.</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I forgot to invite her to my simcha- I'm only human... but <b>what a</b> <b>chutzpah</b> that someone should forget to invite ME...</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I can forget to throw my socks into the hamper- sometimes I'm just soooo tired... but <b>him</b>? How dare he!</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">If any of these examples, or
similar ones, just made your brain go 'oops', I think you'd better keep reading.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The <i>Parsha</i> this week,<span style="font-style: italic;"> Shoftim</span>, speaks about setting up judges and police to ensure some safety in da hood. Safety is a <i>mitzvah</i>. Seat
belts, car seats, property and personal protection... it's all written
in the Big Book. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">But we're gonna talk about a different type of safety
in a different kind of neighborhood. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The neighborhood I speak of is a small one, consisting of just one individual. <i><b>Me</b></i>. Well, that's who's in mine. <i><b>You</b></i>-
are in yours. The point of us setting up judges and police people
(gotta be politically correct) for ourselves is to apply constant
supervision over all of our actions and motivation. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">It is so so easy to find
fault in others: </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>They're spoiling their kids- they really need some chinuch classes.</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Why doesn't she go on a diet- doesn't she have a mirror at home?</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>He's so intense. Why can't he be more like...me?</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">You get the point. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">We
can blame others and we can judge others without the slightest bit of
effort. But this can easily lead to arrogance and stagnation. We need to
turn the microscope around and face it inward. Let's be a little self
absorbed for once. Yes, we do have the obligation to make sure others
are growing in the right direction... but not before we check <i>our own</i>
compasses. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Ever
been on a plane? Notice how the flight attendants make a whole performance
about flight safety? When they act out the scene about <i>what to do when there's a loss of cabin pressure, </i>they tell you very clearly to <b>first make sure your oxygen mask is secured and then reach over to help someone else. </b></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Yeah,
we like helping others improve. Something about that makes us feel all
warm and fuzzy inside. Especially when we can be so focused on <span style="font-style: italic;">their</span>
issues and just put <span style="font-style: italic;">ours</span> on ignore. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1345742999251182">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>"Make for <b>yourself</b> judges and police", </i>as it is written in the parsha,<i> </i>is
our own personal obligation to keep taking notes, asking for
directions, and reviewing our own behaviors in order to continue
improving.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Before we make judgments about other people, we need to make sure to judge ourselves first. And then, fix whatever needs fixing. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
Next
time a child says to you, "When I get bigger, I wanna be a
cop" tell him what a great idea that is. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a great shabbos!</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa </span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-4307771841755414672014-08-22T13:03:00.000-05:002014-08-22T13:32:43.579-05:00Not A Vampire´s Favorite Parsha<span style="font-size: large;">If you often find yourself craving a slurpee or frapp made from
unmodified beast blood, I´d suggest developing a taste for mocha or
strawberry instead. Because, this week’s Torah portion, Re’eh, includes a
prohibition against eating the blood of any animal. Along with this
prohibition, the verse states: “You shall <b>not</b> eat it, in order that it
be well with you and your children after you, when you <b>do </b>what is right
in the eyes of God” <br /><br />
A close examination of the verse reveals an apparent contradiction: The
commandment requires us NOT to do something – namely, to refrain from
eating blood. Yet, the reward of a good life for oneself and one’s
children is predicated on DOING what is right in the eyes of God, even
though there is no actual deed associated with fulfilling this mitzvah.
<br /><br />
The question, then, is whether the reward in this case is granted for
<i>doing</i> the right thing, or for <i>not </i>doing the wrong thing, and how the two
are related.
<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">There is a statement in the Talmud (Kiddushin, 39B), which says that
when someone refrains from doing the wrong thing, his spiritual reward
is on par with having actually performed a positive commandment.<br />
When someone holds back from delivering a really exciting piece of
gossip, her reward for <i>not</i> speaking is equal to her reward for actually <i>doing</i> a positive mitzvah.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">If only some aspects of physical reward worked the same way as spiritual
reward. Imagine if, by refraining from eating a custard doughnut I´d
actually burn as many calories as if I had a full work out! I do try my best, though. I may order two slices of pizza and a whole serving of cajun
fries...but I get it with a Diet Coke, so it sorta cancels out, right?</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">So, Rashi takes this concept a step further: If the Torah
rewards a person for not doing something most people find repulsive in
the first place, such as eating blood, we can imagine how much more
merit a person would receive when overcoming a temptation that is
powerful and readily available.<br />
Of course, each individual is unique. One person’s challenge is another
person’s child’s play. As such, the reward we receive is measured
according to our own personal struggle. This is the meaning of the
Mishnah in Pirkei Avos, “According to the effort, so is the reward.” </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The determining factor is not just actions, but also the sacrifice and
struggle involved in doing the right thing or refraining from acting
improperly. <br />
As a side note, this is also why it´s unfair to place judgement on or to
examine and determine the actions of others. It may seem obvious or
easy to us, but it might be a very difficult challenge for them. And the
opposite is true, as well. Something difficult for us may be a breeze for someone
else. <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">So, <i>not</i> doing something, is equal to <i>doing</i> something. <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">We spend much of our lives focusing on <i>doing</i> things. What am I doing
today? What am I doing this summer? What am I doing with my life? What
am I doing with my talents? <br />
These are all super- powerful questions that must be addressed in order
to accomplish our tasks in life. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">But, there´s another equally significant
side to this that many of us don´t recognize. <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">What am I <i>not</i> doing today? What have I <i>not</i> done this summer? What am I <i>not</i> doing with my life? What am I <i>not</i> doing with my talents?<br />
Super- powerful questions. With super- powerful answers. <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">In order to accomplish our goals, and in order to reach our full
potential in life, we need to turn our focus from what I´m <b><i>doing</i></b>, to
include what I´m <b><i>not</i></b> doing. How many opportunities are passing me by?
How many people am I <i>not</i> helping? How many of my gifts am I <i>not</i> using?
How many lives have I <i>not</i> changed? By recognizing what I´m <i>not</i> doing,
I´ll be able to <i>do</i> a whole lot more.<br /> </span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Oh, and I totally recommend mocha, anyway.<br /><br /> </span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a great Shabbos!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa </span></span>Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-36870054000477566982014-08-08T13:21:00.000-05:002014-08-08T14:10:57.340-05:00A Grave Mitzva<span style="font-size: medium;">Have you seen the movie <span style="font-style: italic;">The Ten Commandments? </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-style: italic;"></span>If you liked the movie, you would <i>love</i> the book. To read the original and authentic version, open up the <span style="font-style: italic;">chumash</span> to the <span style="font-style: italic;">sedra</span> this week, <i>Véschanan</i>. All ten are fascinating, interesting, and beneficial to all of us, but we're gonna focus on just one of them now: <span style="font-style: italic;">Honor thy father and mother. </span> </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Did you know that<span style="font-style: italic;"> kibud av vaem </span>is the<span style="font-style: italic;"> only </span>commandment
that is required of us to fulfill after death too? No, this isn´t a horror film; the dead
person remains in the grave at all times. What I mean is that even after a parent
dies they must still be treated with and spoken about with the same respect
as if they were alive. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><br />Who do we know that was famous for his <span style="font-style: italic;">kibud av vaem</span>? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">The first person is <span style="font-style: italic;">Esav</span>. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Then, there's also the famous story in the <i>gemorah</i> of <span style="font-style: italic;">Dama Ben Nesina.</span> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">What do these two people have in common besides possessing strange
names? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">They both were not Jewish. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Interestingly, the only people
mentioned in the Torah for their outstanding behavior towards their
parents are non-Jews. How could it be that the <i>one</i>
commandment which we are obligated to follow during life as well as after death is
not even being fulfilled properly by Jews- only by the other nations?<br /><br />So there's a <span style="font-style: italic;">machlokes- argument </span>in the <span style="font-style: italic;">gemorah </span>about the complications of the <span style="font-style: italic;">mitzva</span> of <span style="font-style: italic;">kidud horim.</span> Rav Yochanan said 'lucky is the person who's an
orphan'. This statement was alluding to the fact that the <span style="font-style: italic;">mitzva</span> of kibud av vaem is the most difficult <span style="font-style: italic;">mitzva</span> in the Torah. <br />There's another <span style="font-style: italic;">gemorah</span> that says that fulfilling this <span style="font-style: italic;">mitzva</span>
properly is so hard, that it's better not to have been born at all. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">How weird is that? Nowhere else do we see the Torah speaking this way!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Is it also better to be born without an arm so we don't have to wear
tefillin? Or without knees so we don't have to cover them? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Why is
this commandment so especially hard for Jews to keep, but non-Jews
can excel at it? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"> </span><span style="font-size: medium;">Let's hear the <span style="font-style: italic;">Maharal's </span>perspective on it.<br /><br />We
were brought into this world by our parents. Without them, we wouldn't
be. I know its hard to picture the world without us, but it would go on
even with that loss. We owe our parents everything, just for
bringing us here. </span><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177"> </span></span><br />
<br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">One of the
most fundamental aspects of Judaism is the knowledge that we are
presently living in a temporary world, walking through it in order to
get to the <span style="font-style: italic;">real</span> world. <br />But, there's only one person that will be responsible for my entrance into the next world. Not Dad. Not Mom. Not God. Only<span style="font-weight: bold;"> </span><i>me.</i> <br /> </span></span><br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">Our non-Jewish neighbors and fellow world inhabitants are born to eat pepperoni pizza
and Big Macs. They live for material pleasures and gastronomical pleasure and sensual pleasure and fashion pleasures.They are created, and then brought into <span style="font-weight: bold;"><i>the</i> </span>world.
<i><b>This </b></i>is the place they live for. Therefore, it's logical for them to be overflowing with
gratitude to their parents for
bringing them into the world of their dreams.</span></span><br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">There is no other way they
could've gotten here to be able to experience their wordly pleasures.<br /> </span></span><br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">The Jews, however, were brought into this world, where we spend all our waking hours living for the <span style="font-style: italic;">next </span>world. </span></span><br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">Don't get me wrong- I have an unbreakable bond with my pizza. Don't even <i>try</i> getting between us. But even while eating pizza, or sushi, or shwarma...or, while vacationing in Puerto Rico or Cancun....or while driving my BMW or wearing my beautiful ring of diamonds, I'm supposed to be
focusing on and striving toward my eternal life in the <i>real</i> world. </span></span><br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">That. Is. Hard. </span></span><br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">So, since we're just paying rent here and not
buying a permanent home, maybe we're not naturally that full of gratitude to our parents, because we're not really that thrilled to be here at all.<br />Our parents have
nothing to do with our entrance to the next world. Only we do. And
that's the world we're living for. So, perhaps we have a more difficult time
respecting them and honoring them than the others have.<br /><br />But,
since we
could never get to our eternal home without first passing through here,
it´s imperative to recognize everything our parents did for us and
continue to do
for us- from giving us life, to the constant
physical and emotional support they supply us with, the list will have
no beginning and no end. Therefore, the respect that we should have for
them is equally limitless- and that's why the <span style="font-style: italic;">mitzva</span> extends into the grave. <br /><br />"</span></span><span style="font-size: medium;">Children are a great comfort in your old age - and they help
you reach it faster, too</span><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">" :)<br /> </span></span><br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">Have a great shabbos!</span></span><br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989180" style="font-size: medium;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1343973362989177">Yaffa </span></span>Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-17479332876879489512014-07-25T16:06:00.000-05:002014-07-25T16:19:05.872-05:00Am I A Murderer?<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1342799546827110">One of the themes in the <span style="font-style: italic;">parsha </span>this week <span style="font-style: italic;">(Maasei)</span> is the Cities of Refuge, the <span style="font-style: italic;">arai miklat. </span>These
are special cities where entry is allowed only by someone who's guilty
of accidental murder. The reason these cities were founded was not only
to escape the perhaps revengeful hand of the victim's pained family, but also because people who belong there are generally good, straight
individuals who committed these unforgivable crimes completely by
mistake, and were so torn and broken about it that they just didn't know
what to do with themselves or where to go.<br /><br />The <span style="font-style: italic;">Chidushei HaRim </span>explains that when someone in <span style="font-style: italic;">klal yisrael </span>hurts
someone, even unintentionally, he naturally feels full of pain and
guilt. In fact, he'll be so broken that he'll feel as if he has no place
in the world for him to go. That's why <span style="font-style: italic;">Hashem </span>is offering him this City Of Refuge- a safe cove for him to hide in until the passing of the <span style="font-style: italic;">Kohen Gadol </span>which served as the dismissal bell.<br /><br />I
have a friend who, a couple of years ago, at the age of 28 had 6 kids
under the age of 10. May she live and be well. One day, her husband went
into the hospital for a very minor, uncomplicated sinus procedure,
where he was in the hands of a skilled doctor. During the surgery,
though, the doctor <span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">accidentally </span>touched
a wrong nerve which caused bleeding in his eye. While trying to fix
that, he shifted the bleeding and caused his patient a serious brain
hemorrhage. He remained in the hospital, completely relying on life
support, in a vegetative state, for the last few months of his life.<br />The
point of bringing you this tragic story was not just to be a carrier of
bad news. No way. It's because the doctor, a fine, honest, caring Jew,
was so beside himself with pain and guilt that he just didn't, and still
doesn't know where to put himself. He wants to run. He wants to hide.
He wants to cry. He wants to repent. When I was reading the <span style="font-style: italic;">parsha </span>this
week, I understood a little better how important it is to have these
cities of refuge for people who are guilty- but purely by accident.<br /><br />Now,
there's a catch here. Yes, the cities of refuge are a wonderful thing
for people. But, it only helps if a person really feels remorse and
pain. It only benefits a person who is so shattered by what he did that
he feels there is no place in the world for him to go. Someone who's
not touched or moved too deeply by his mistake will <span style="font-style: italic;">not </span>find consolation or benefit in any way from going there.<br />Why not?<br />Because
when you harm someone in any way, and you deeply regret it, this can be
something very positive and beneficial. It can motivate you to improve.
It can encourage you to be more careful next time. Even when we do
things by accident, there's a high chance that if we would have been
just <span style="font-style: italic;">that </span>much more careful, it
wouldn't have happened. So if the guilty feeling brings one to be more
attentive or less negligent in the future, there will definitely be a
positive outcome from their mistake. And that's what the <span style="font-style: italic;">arei miklat </span>are for. To help deal with the guilty party's emotions and help him become a person who's more conscious and careful.<br /><br />Thank
God most of us aren't actually killing anybody, but we still manage to hurt
people in many other ways. We don't have a City Of Refuge for that, nor
do we need one. But let's at least try to feel guilty when we do, and
try to turn those feelings into greater consciousness and alertness.<br /><br />Someone once went to the Steipler Gaon and asked him for a <span style="font-style: italic;">bracha </span>that
he should be found innocent in court for a violation of a traffic law.
Instead of giving him a blessing, the Steipler admonished him, saying
"If you violated a traffic law, you're endangering the lives of other
people. Therefore, you are deserving of the greatest punishment."</span>We hurt people with words and with actions. Ironically, we also hurt people with a lack of words and a lack of action.<br />This
weeks <i>parsha</i> teaches us AWARENESS. To recognize when we have caused
someone pain and to feel so bad about that mistake, that we will not
repeat it again in the future.<br /><br />Have a great shabbos!</span>
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Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-61955759531760400292014-07-18T15:23:00.000-05:002014-07-18T15:23:11.277-05:00Sticks And Stones May Break My Bones<span style="font-size: large;">Generally, I refrain from perpetuating stereotypes. But this one I have actual proof of: Women like to talk. We bounce ideas off each other about everything from dinner ideas to fashion tips to career moves. We talk about politics and share philosophies, we vent, advise, and criticize. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">But we never speak <i>loshon horah</i>, of course. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">In fact, out of the ten levels of speech gifted to the world, the female section grabbed nine, leaving only one for males to use. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Women also speak more quickly than men do, devote more brainpower to chit-chat, and actually get a buzz out of hearing their own voices.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Basically, women were created with an eight-lane superhighway for processing and expressing emotion, while men have just a small country road. With cool tractors.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This is why I wasn't surprised to find that while the parsha discusses the concept of <i>nedarim, </i>making and breaking promises, it references women more than men. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Of course men have also been noted to speak without thinking, but womens' tongues are usually looser. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Parshas Matos speaks about words. About making promises. And about the consequences of breaking them. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Let's talk about words for a minute.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The main thing that differentiates a human being from an animal is the power of speech. While most animals can communicate as a survival mechanism, no one other than mankind can creatively communicate or express a philosophical query. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Speech is also what connects the spiritual world with the physical. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And, speech transforms abstract thoughts into reality. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Speech is holy. It is the tool of creation. Through speech we can build individuals- with praise and encouragement. By making others feel important, we instill in them confidence and dignity, making them feel that their existence is necessary and their presence is significant. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">But, the greater the potential for <i>con</i>struction, the greater its power for <i>de</i>struction. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Speech can also be very unholy. It can be used to destroy. By making someone feel worthless, we can wipe out their self esteem and shatter their dignity. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Gossip, rumors, accusations being spread without being confirmed can tear apart relationships, families, reputations, and even entire communities. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">We all love the invention of the internet and the creation of social media. There are many pros to living in our era; an era in which it is of more significance to have a million twitter followers than a million dollars. So much <i>chessed </i>has been achieved through it- thousands of people across the globe praying for someone in need of prayer, collecting tzeddaka for those in need, organizing food, events, activities to benefit others. Many friendships have developed, support groups created, so much Torah shared, and just so many positive, life altering connections have been made. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">But with everything good, there is an equal potential for bad. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">How can we blindly believe one sided, bias articles that circulate social media? People are constantly spreading stories that catch their attention without realizing that the internet, and especially social media sites, are the number one platform for exposing whatever personal agenda the author may have. Because the writer knows that if it's something sensational or something that pulls at the heartstrings, the public will eat it up. And we will always have people who believe the underdog, even when the underdog is the one in the wrong. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">When we read an online article slamming another individual, we need to do our own objective research before believing it. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Do we realize that <i>loshon horah </i>is far worse a crime than what many of these culprits are being blamed for? We need to take extreme caution before spreading these vicious rumors. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">There's another thing Ive noticed about our era that can have the ability to be absolutely <i>con</i>structive, but instead, is often absolutely <i>de</i>structive. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The benefit to chatting with people on social media, or through text, over chatting with them in person, is the extra moment we have to filter what we say. We have the ability to proofread what we want to say before clicking 'send'. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">So, why don't we? Why are we sometimes nasty instead? People tend to be even nastier online than they would be in real life, since they're hiding behind a screen. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It should be the opposite. You have a hard time complimenting someone to their face? Try it through text. This is what technology was created for; to help us grow. To become better versions of ourselves. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">There's an old saying, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me." </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This expression is incorrect. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I wudda written, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will send me to therapy for the rest of my life."</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">One second. How'd we get into all that? We just got blown away on a huge tangent. I must be a woman. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Let's get back to promises. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The possuk tells us, <i>Lo yachel devaro</i>, which rashi explains to mean- if you don't keep your word, you become profane. By not keeping your word, you are taking something that's holy out of its holiness. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The opposite is true, too. By <i>keeping </i>your word, you become holy. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Sticking to your words, following through with your promises, are what consecrates you, or defiles you.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">People who keep their word are reliable, respectable, and trustworthy. They are people of integrity. It means that they value themselves as well as others, creating a healthy level of self worth. Keeping your word means being true to yourself. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">If you have a problem keeping your word, or if you are unable to use the power of speech positively, when there is so much good that can come from it, you might want to explore why.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">And now, story time.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Once upon a time, there was a wealthy man. One day, while sitting in his
study arranging his accounts, his young son came up to him, asking him
for money to buy a candy. <br />He handed him a gold coin. <br />The boy
goes out and returns, happily licking his treat. When his father asked
for the change, he replied that he didn't get any. <br /><br />The man went down to the grocery to inquire about it. <br />The
store owner said he did not receive a gold coin from the boy; it was
copper one, and as an argument ensued, they each maintained their
positions. <br /><br />Seeing as they were unable to reach an agreement,
they took their case to <i>beis din,</i> who ruled that the proprietor has to
swear that he did not receive a gold coin from the boy.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The plaintiff objected, stating that he doesn't want him swearing falsely and requested that they dismiss the case. <br />Case dismissed. <br />But
then....the people started talking. Very soon the story was buzzing
all over the city, and no one wanted to have anything to do with a lying
crook. <br />So, they boycotted his store, he was scorned in shul, his
kids were bullied in school, and his wife was pointed at and whispered
about at the store. <br /><br />Penniless, and with no dignity left, he packed up his
family and sadly said good bye to the place he had lived in since birth,
to the only place his family knew as home, in hopes of starting all
over in a new environment. <br /><br />A few months pass. The wealthy man
received a heavy envelope in the mail. Opening it, he came face to face
with a gold coin and a letter. <br />In it was an apology from an unknown
man, admitting to stealing a gold coin from him a few months back, and
is now repaying that debt. <br /><br />He explained that he had been in a
grave financial predicament and as he walked passed his home one day, he
noticed the man's son playing with a gold coin. He rationalized that if
this homeowner is so wealthy that his son can sit and play with a gold
coin, he surely won't miss it for a few months, and he exchanged his
copper coin for the gold one. <br /><br />Realizing what had happened, it was apparent that the grocer was innocent, and had been telling the truth all along. <br />But...too little, too late. <br /><br />So, who's to blame for the dreadful turn of events in the grocer's life?<br />Whose fault was it that his reputation was destroyed, that he lost his job his home, and his dignity?<br /><br />Was it the fault of the rich man?<br />The grocer?<br />The boy?<br />The thief?<br /><br />None of the above. <br />The
blame goes to the people who spoke the <i>loshon hora</i>. It goes to those
who gossiped and spread rumors about something they knew nothing about. <br /><br />Please, my dear friends, let's be careful. Social media has the potential to be responsible for some amazing accomplishments. <br />But it also has the power to destroy people in ways we cannot even imagine. <br />And when that happens, there's no one to blame but we, the people. <br /></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos! </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span><br />
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-54602483302109079242014-07-04T14:15:00.001-05:002014-07-04T14:22:49.637-05:00Mission: Impossible?<span style="font-size: large;">What a long, hard week this has been. After eighteen difficult, uncertain days waiting for news about our three kidnapped brothers, our hope sprinkled with anguish, we heard the final, tragic news of their brutal deaths. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> But, despite all the heartache and tears from those events, the thing that pained me most is what happened afterwards. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Ninety nine percent of my corner of the internet was filled with articles, stories, and all sorts of propaganda laden with commentary about violence and retaliation on our end. About more bloodshed through revenge and anger. And then, counter articles degrading the fellow Jews suggesting those actions along with endless negative reports about Israel. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Why was this so bothersome? I'll explain it based on a possuk from this week's parsha, <i>Balak. </i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Balak, the King of Moav, is afraid of the Israelites who
will soon be passing through his homeland on their way to Israel. So, in the hopes of destroying them, he hires a
non-Jewish prophet, Bil'am, to cast terrible curses upon them. As the story goes on, we see that God did not allow Bil'am
to do this and, miraculously, He turned the curses in his mouth into a series of beautiful and
poetic blessings for the people of Israel.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The very first of the curses that became blessings, goes like this: </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-style: normal;"></span>"Hen Am Levadad Yishkon Uvagoyim
Lo Yischashuv"<span style="font-style: normal;"> -</span>"Behold it is a nation that will dwell in
solitude and not be reckoned among the nations."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Apropos much?</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Yes, we have felt lonelier than ever as a nation during the last 20ish days. How much attention has our story of abduction received in the press? How much support have we received from world leaders? Not much. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">But, I can't really blame them, what with way bigger things going on in the world. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">They're not my problem.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This isn't the loneliness that dispirited me. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Our aloneness is not about isolation, distrust or discomfort from the other nations; but rather about unconditional unity and solidarity among the Jewish nation. That no matter what, I got your back and you've got mine. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The unity that formed during the infamous 18 days of hope, was stronger than I've ever seen among us. Jews from every corner of the world, of every color and form, united together in prayer, action and thought. United with one common goal: to #BringBackOurBoys. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">That was all that mattered. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Because, when a family member is suffering, we are all in pain. And with the tragic ending to the story, each one of us lost a piece of our hearts along with them. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The connection we formed all across the globe, was inspiring, enriching, and empowering. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">And that's why what happened afterwards was such a deep stab in the heart. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Revenge? Counter attacks? Bombings? More violence? More bloodshed?</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Yes, we need to recognize evil and reject it. We need to be passionate about right and wrong. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> But, as Jews, we always take the high road. We don't stoop to the level of our attackers. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">We can never stop terror. Making peace when only one party wants it is a mission impossible. Our job is not to stop terror, we will never succeed at it.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Our job is to continue living! To unite as one, with a common goal, hold each others' hands, and plow through! To never let them break our spirit! To never let them break our unity!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Because, yes, we are alone. We are alone in our uniquness, in our connection with God, and in our common bond; the Torah. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">And just like we were able to unite so strongly during times of darkness, we need to spread that unity and carry it into the light. More tolerance, more empathy, more warmth, more smiles, more love. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The more unity we have, the less jealousy there is in the world. The more compassion we have, the less judgement there is. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Are we really, truly, sincerely happy for our friends' successes? Do we honestly wish for their uninterrupted joy and blessing?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">There's a quote Ive seen that's gotten quite a bit of attention:</span><br />
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;">"Lots of people want to ride with you in
the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you
when the limo breaks down."</span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;"></span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
</div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;">I disagree. </span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
</div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;">Most of the time, we run to help people when the bus breaks down, but turn our noses up when they're riding in their limo's. Real unity, real uniquness, real love, means feeling the happiness and success of our friends' and not just their sorrows. </span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;">We are a nation in solitude. We are one with each other because we are one with Hashem.</span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos!</span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="copy-paste-block">
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span></div>
<br />
<span style="font-style: normal;"></span>Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-1178230805378173742014-06-20T15:56:00.003-05:002014-06-20T16:55:39.634-05:00Some People Are Wise; Some Are Otherwise<div id="yiv1770659005">
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106193">
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106190" style="background-color: white; color: black; font-family: times new roman,new york,times,serif;">
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">I found this story in Rav Dessler's <i>michtav me'eliyahu, </i>and he writes there that he saw it written by Rav Hai Gaon.<br />Obviously Im paraphrasing.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The
setting is a forest with a lion and a fox conversing calmly. The fox
remains cool when the lion casually asks if he can eat him for dinner. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Now, the fox knows that the lion is an Atkin's kinda guy. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">"Your
majesty," explains the fox, "I'm a skinny and bony piece of meat. I
will be a fat free, carbs free, taste free
dinner. I know just what will satisfy you. I will introduce you to a
very fat human being who will serve as the most tasty, luscious meal for
his majesty". </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">They walk a few feet
and stand beside an invisible pit, covered with only branches and
leaves. Behind it sits a Jewish man wrapped in his <i>tallis and tefillin</i>. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">"Hmmm"
drooled the lion, "he looks real tempting. But, I'm afraid he might
start praying and then something bad will happen to me...". </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">"Oh,
don't be silly," replied Mr. Fox, "nothing will happen to you, or to
your son. Maybe your grandson will have to suffer for it, but that's
really far ahead. By the time your grandson comes around you would have
enjoyed this (any many more) tantalizing meals. Don't worry, Your
Highness, indulge!"</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The lion's persuaded and runs towards the man. While running over the covered pit, he falls
inside and is trapped.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Smirking, the fox peers over the edge of the pit and looks down.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">"Didn't you tell me that the punishment would only come upon my grandson," growled the angry lion? </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">"Hmmm...," the fox scratches his head, "...maybe <i>your</i> grandfather did something wrong, and now <i>you're</i> suffering!"</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">This humorous little fable is actually a lot deeper than it appears on the surface. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">In this week's <i>parsha, Korach, </i>who
was an intelligent man and an honorable person, made a grave
mistake. He, along with 250 heads of the Sanhedrin, openly accused <i>Moshe </i>and <i>Aharon</i>
of making the fate of the Jewish people worse by taking them out of
Egypt. </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Between you and me, this is the stupidest thing Ive ever
heard. It was
obvious that life outside of slavery was ideal and more enjoyable, and
yet, <i>Korach </i>and his teammates (including the renowned delinquents <i>Dasan </i>and <i>Aveeram</i>) insisted with such certainty about the misdeeds of <i>Moshe</i> and <i>Aharon,</i> that it actually sounded true and convincing.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Sometimes
we come across the most intelligent, educated people who vigorously
argue their opinions and convictions, when there's no doubt that what
they're saying is in complete contrast with <i>the Torah</i>. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106201">
<span style="font-size: large;">We have to be careful not to let their intelligence blind us from realizing that we cannot trust them when their <b>personal desires block them from seeing the truth</b>.
Since they're so smart, they can use their intelligence to mislead
others
into accepting their argument as truth and logic. When we have our own
agenda, we can easily fail to focus on the truth, but rather everything
seems to surround our personal desires. This, needless to say is very
dangerous. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This, is how Obama became president. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106207">
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106206"> </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106207">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106206">The most
obvious contemporary example portraying this idea would be
$$$$ . How many
marriages suffer because of misuse of money?
How many times does one spouse mindlessly
spend more than they earn causing the breadwinner to either go into
heart attack induced debt, or, worse, leading them to work
dishonestly to fulfill the spouses' desires? We can easily be carried away by our
wants, (aka needs) allowing ourselves to further crooked our
priorities. The same thing is with honor. On whatever level, a person
running after fame or recognition can be blinded from the truth while
trying
to reach his goal. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Getting
back to the forest scene from earlier, maybe the lion fell into the
trap simply because he was attracted to some fatty meat? <b>His desire prevented him from seeing what he realized afterward was the truth. </b></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106187">
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106184"> </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106187">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1340368211106184">We have to be on guard constantly. Either we're bound to meet people who seem smart, but are doing things we know are anti <i>Torah</i>, and we
need to not be misled by their charm and intelligence. Or, we,
ourselves might arrive at a moment where our personal desires may start
taking over our knowledge of right and wrong, and therefore we have to
have clarity of mind and be focused on the truth in order to assure
that our personal agenda will not interfere. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> I
don't know about you, but I can never have a piece of chocolate
cake or full fat ice cream all by myself. I always need to know that
someone else is gonna gain the weight too, so before I indulge I run
around looking for people to share in the delight with me. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Nobody likes to sin alone. We tend to drag people down with us. If we have a convincing argument, they're certain to join us. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Korach </i>and
his people were intelligent, high class, educated men who had a
convincing argument which contradicted the truth. These are the kind of
people we have to keep our distance from... and also, to be cautious not
to become one of them.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a great shabbos!</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa </span></span></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-72197753639923560742014-05-16T15:05:00.001-05:002014-05-16T15:05:36.136-05:00Pizza Or Donuts?<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Some people
seem to have perfect lives. I know families who have multiple BMW's and go on
yearly cruises, and have beautiful, smart, healthy children, they have
respectable careers, they give of themselves to the community, they're popular,
have harmony in the home...I mean, can anything get better? </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">And yet, most of these
people, rich, full lives and all, seem to feel as if their lives are chocolate
glazed donuts. Yes, life is full and rich and shiny and enjoyable.... but
there's a hole in the middle. Something's missing. There's a level of real
happiness and contentment that's just not there.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">The parsha
this week speaks about reward and punishment in regard to the mitzvos. <i>Im
bechukosai teleichu</i>...if you go in the way of my <i>chukim</i>...then the
Torah goes on to list a whole bunch of <i>bracho</i></span><i><span lang="EN-US">t</span></i><span lang="EN-US"> that'll come your way. But<i>, im
bechukosai tima'asu</i>...if you despise my</span><span dir="RTL"></span><span dir="RTL"></span><span dir="RTL" lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span dir="RTL"></span><span dir="RTL"></span> </span><i><span lang="EN-US">chukim</span></i><span lang="EN-US">...then the Torah presents a whole
group of <i>klalot</i>- curses to send upon the person.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">I have 2
questions on this:</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">1. Why does
the possuk use the word <i>teleichu</i>, which means to 'walk' with the mitzvos
instead of the word <i>tishmoru, </i>to 'keep' the mitzvos?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">2. What
exactly are the <i>chukim</i>?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">So, Rashi
answers the second question. He says, <i>shet'hiyu ameilim baTorah</i>... put
effort into learning Torah.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">So, instead
of solving this problem, I think another one was just created. Rashi seems to
be explaining that the learning of the Torah is a <i>chok.</i></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">What's a <i>chok</i>?
It's a law in which the human mind can't see the reason behind it.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Is Rashi
telling us that learning Torah is a <i>chok</i>? It would seem to be a <i>mishpat</i>,
since we <i>do</i> know why we learn it!</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"><span> </span>We learn Torah, so that we can keep it!</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Like, when
that long awaited moment of receiving a drivers' license arrives... in order to
be able to do the driving, you must first learn how to drive.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">How are we
supposed to keep the mitzvos without first learning what they are and how to
keep them?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Here's the
amazing <i>chidush</i>. The <b>learning</b>, itself<b>, </b>is not a <i>chok</i>.
Of course we understand why that's a must.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"><span> </span>It's the <i>ameilut</i>, the <b>toiling</b> in
Torah that we don't understand. The constant delving into deeper depths, the
round the clock shuckeling, the never ending thumb swaying... that's what we
don't understand. How can it be that people spend 50 or 70 years of their lives
sitting on a bench, that might as well have been a swing, and read, learn, and
shake, and actually feel fulfilled?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">It's
because they understand the beauty of Torah, they appreciate its worth. If
someone came into your office five minutes before closing time and offers you a
million dollars to stay five hours overtime, who will think twice about
staying? Of course you'll work longer, since you understand and appreciate the
value of the dollar.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">So, the <i>learning
</i>of the Torah, we understand is a <i>mishpat,</i> but all the extra toil is
a <i>chok</i> since we, as outsiders, can't humanly understand why someone will
stay up til two AM learning, only to wake up again at four and resume, but he
does it because he appreciates it and loves it. And that brings him to an increasingly
high level of happiness. True happiness.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Now,
remember<span> </span>the other issue we had? The
'walking' thing?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">This is the
act, other than breathing, that comes most naturally to a person. You don't
have to think 'right, left, right, left...' as you walk, unless you're at your
graduation. You just walk. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">To walk, is
literally <i>a way of life</i>, since it's one's most natural action.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"><span> </span>The Torah is supposed to be not something we
just 'keep' or 'do' or 'study'. It should become a way of life. Like we walk
without thinking, since it's a part of us, we need to do the mitzvos like
they're a part of us. They need to <i>become </i>a part of us.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Remember
the people we spoke about whose donut lives have holes in them? So here's an
idea. Let's fill up the holes! </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Listen to
the recipe:</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"><span> </span>There are some donuts that come filled. Let’s
take one that’s filled with jelly, as our example.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">There are 2
types of Jews in the world:</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">A Jelly
Donut Jew and a Pizza Pie Jew. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Which group
are you a member of?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">When you
have a pie of pizza, and you have 8 people waiting to eat, you slice up the pie
into 8, pull out each sizzling slice, and each person receives their own piece.
Now, say we have a jelly donut with 4 people waiting to indulge. So the donut
gets cut into 4, with each person receiving a quarter, but together with each
piece, comes along a little bit of the jelly in each corner. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Because the
Jelly is the central point of the donut.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">There are
different ways of using our unique Jewish lives. We can act and dress and speak
and think just like our <span> </span>coworkers or
neighbors, although of course remembering to throw in some prayers and maybe even
bentch... where each slice of pizza is individual and disconnected.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Or, we can
act, speak, dress, feel, think, and walk like a Jew no matter where we work, or
what we do. Each action will have a little bit of the jelly at the tip. Every
step we take will be guided by the Torah. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Because
Judaism is not a religion. It's a way of life. </span></span></i></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">We walk
with it.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"> This is
what brings us fulfillment and happiness. This is what people need to fill into
their holes in order to be truly happy. A life of understanding and
appreciating the value of Torah , and bringing it into your life making it part
and parcel of who you are.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">BRING ON
THE JELLY!</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">And since I’m
in a poetic mood….</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">As you go
through life,</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">No matter
what your goal</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Keep your
eyes upon the donut,</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">And not
upon the hole.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a great shabbos</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-30433036482724669742014-05-02T18:08:00.000-05:002014-05-02T18:08:06.151-05:00The Crime Of Mediocrity<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>There are many cross breeds out there on the farm, but the most common one is that of a donkey
stallion and a horse mare. What evolves is a Mule. The mule is known to
be exceptionally strong. The reason being, that although the offspring
is fully developed as a male or female, it is almost always born
sterile, and therefore, unable to naturally further mule production. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Sometimes,
when an animal has a certain blemish or imperfection, that lack is
compensated by an increase in strength or value of the animal. Unlike
the mule who's sterile by birth, some animals are purposely castrated in
order to increase their strength. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>But, as taught to us in <em>Parshas Emor,</em> although these animals with blemishes might have a greater value because of it,
<em>they are still unfit for a korban.</em></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Throughout the </span><span><em>Torah, </em>we
find that completion and wholeness takes precedence over quantity. Say
you have two types of bread on the table in front of you. One is a large
loaf, conveniently pre-sliced. The other is a round, bite-size roll,
strangely resembling a meatball. Which of these would have the honor of
receiving your <em>Hamotzee?</em> Obviously the meatball one. Why?
Because although the other is bigger and fluffier, and you even bought
it at the French bakery, it has a blemish. It's not whole anymore. So
the <em>bracha</em> goes on the one that's whole and pure, since that perfection makes it more <em>choshuv.</em> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Our <em>avodas Hashem</em> is <u>not</u> measured by quantity, but rather, by how close it is to perfection. <strong>The
object of the game isn't about how many <em>chumrahs </em>we take upon ourselves, but rather, how carefully we do each <em>mitzvah.</em> </strong></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><strong></strong> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>There's a <em>gemorah</em> that says: <em>Haosek b'mitzvah patur min hamitzvah, when you're busy with one mitzvah, you're exempt from doing another one.</em> Why is that? Shouldn't we spend the whole day grabbing 'em off the shelves and filling up our shopping carts with as many <em>mitzvos</em> as we can fit in? </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Sort of, but not quite. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>When we're involved with a <em>mitzvah</em>, we have to make sure that it will be done properly and with completion. The <em>gemorah</em> warns a person very sternly, listing terrible punishments which will be brought onto one who doesn't finish a <em>mitzvah</em>
that he started. The idea is that if you're gonna do something, do it
right. Otherwise
we're settling for mediocrity. </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Mediocrity is problematic
because it means that one does not allow himself to do or become something of
ultimate value and therefore he sells himself short. Like, if
someone would steal my Porsche and sell it on Ebay for the
best bid. Ouch. That's painful, because it's worth so much more than that. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>And this is the meaning of the <em>gemorah</em>- that we should be so focused on and active about the <em>mitzvah </em>at
hand, and on trying to fulfill it to completion and perfection, that
we don't have to get involved with another one until the original is
successfully done.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span><br /></span></span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>This gemorah is especially popular among my crowd of procrastinators. I wanted to copy it and hang it up in my office (I'm president of the popular club, Procratinators' Unite...Tomorrow), but never got around to it yet. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>But, to my chagrin, this focus on the 'one <em>mitzvah</em> at a time' thing is not to excuse nor encourage laziness or stagnation. On the contrary. <em>Of course</em>
we're trying to fill up our shopping carts, but if the new item is
going to ruin one of the old ones in there, it's better that we
first move the old one out of the way before adding a new one. If taking
a new <em>mitzvah </em>upon yourself is going to interfere with doing the present one properly, <em>we are not obligated to accept the new one.</em> But, a person who wants to have the most items at checkout is going to finish up the original <em>mitzvah </em>quickly,
and complete it as fast as he can, in order to be prepared to start the
new one. So it's constant movement, focus, involvement, thinking, and
determination. </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><br /></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> <span>Let's talk about mediocrity.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> <span>Listen to this great
story about a great person, with a great moral. </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Rav Simcha Wasserman once gave an ultimatum to the principals of a few <em>yeshivos</em>
in the United States, telling them that they have to make a choice.
Either they teach secular studies properly and thoroughly in their <em>yeshivos</em>, or they shouldn't teach them at all. Because otherwise, he explained to them, they're teaching their <em>b'nei Torah </em>to be mediocre. And that's a crime. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><br />We have to try our hardest to reach perfection in our actions. We have to give everything our best shot. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><strong>Success isn't measured by quantity, but by quality.</strong> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>It's not measured by how many kids we have, but rather by what kind of parent we are to them. Not by how many people we were <em>mekarev</em>, but by how much of a <em>kiddush Hashem </em>we make in their presence. Not by how many items we sold in our store today, but by
how much of our heart was in it, and by how beautiful our business ethics were.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>So,
an animal can have many extra qualities because of a certain negative
physical condition, but since it's lacking in its ability to reach
perfection, it will be rejected as a <em>korban.</em><em> </em></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><em></em>Before I sign off, there's one small thing bothering me.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>We're
supposed to be perfect. Yet, as human beings, we never can be. </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>So why don't I just stop
before I even start, so I don't hafta look like a drop-out?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Because no one is actually saying that we have to be perfect. </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Nobody is perfect; that's why pencils have erasers. Human
beings are not capable of creating perfection, only God can make
something perfect, and I <em>really </em>don't want His job. </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>What <strong>can</strong> we do, though? Great timing for this question. We're in the process right now of counting the days of <em>sefiras haomer</em>. We count up to 50, which is the numeral representing <strong>perfection.</strong>
But we don't actually count the 50th day. We stop at 49. Because we're
not capable of reaching perfection. </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>But, we are capable of counting 49, and by counting 49, it's as if we counted 50. Why? Because 50 is the
automatic result of putting in effort and achieving the first 49. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Now in English.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1336671340778195">
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1336671340778192"> </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1336671340778195">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1336671340778192">We cannot <em>be</em> perfect, but we can <em>desire</em> perfection and strive toward it. <strong> </strong></span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1336671340778195">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1336671340778192"><strong>There are no perfect people
in this world,</strong><strong> only perfect intentions.</strong> </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1336671340778195">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1336671340778192">We
have to aim for the top and try our best in all our actions. If we
spend 49 days striving for completion and perfection in our <em>avodas Hashem</em>, the results will be viewed by <em>Hashem</em> as perfection, as they're carried up to 50. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>I just wanna share with you something <em>awesome</em> that
I heard from a former student Leba (you know who you are) who heard it from Yocheved
(you also know who you are), with special thanx to her anonymous <em>chavrusa (</em>do you know who you are?) and here it is. It's a <em>mishnah</em> in <em>yuma</em>:</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span><em> </em></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><em>Lifnei
mi atem metaharim umi metaher eschem- Avichem shebashamayim- before
whom are you purified, and who purifies you? Our Father in Heaven.</em></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
<span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Take the word <em>mi</em> that's written twice. The numerical value of that
word is 50. So now, let's understand this quote differently. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><em>"Before 50, we hafta purify ourselves, (<u>u</u>mi) and <u>from</u> 50, Hashem purifies us." </em></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>How awesome is that?!</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span>Have a beautiful shabbos,</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span></span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-52133262764697869822014-04-25T12:37:00.002-05:002014-04-25T13:39:35.474-05:00Does My Holiness Have Holes In It?<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> <i>Parshas Kedoshim </i>begins with the commandment for us to be holy, just like <i>Hashem </i>is holy. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">What is holiness? What does it mean to be a person of sanctity?</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Does holiness mean kissing every <i>mezuzah</i> within arm's distance throughout your day? </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Maybe the Holiness Award goes to he who can <i>shuckle</i> the most wildly, both frontward and backward and still maintain his balance. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Perhaps
a person of sanctity is one who carries a magnifying glass around his
neck so he can be confident that each glass of water he drinks is 100%
bug free?</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Maybe it means prohibiting the internet till it just obliterates from the world! </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Or, banning exercise classes that don't limit their music to Yeshiva Boys Choir!</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Oh, I know- holiness means making a bonfire and burning your <i>avoda zara sheitel.</i> Or better yet, if you wanna be one of
even greater holiness, go pick a <i>sheitel</i> store of your choice, and burn it down to the ground! C'mon- DO THE WORK OF THE LORD!</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">I'm afraid not, my friends. Perhaps we should take a close look at the words in the <i>p'sukim</i> to help us understand what it means to be a truly holy person.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The very first sentence written, after telling us to be holy, is<b> not</b>, surprisingly, '<i>shmoneh esrai should take a minimum of 25 minutes.' </i> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It says 'HONOR YOUR PARENTS.' </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Then, the verses continue with a large variety of <i>mitzvos- bein adam l'chaveiro, between man and his friend.</i> Yes, there are some commandments that are <i>bein adam laMakom, between man and God</i>, but the overwhelming majority seem to be focused on the proper behavior patterns
among human beings. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">In order to bring<i> Kedusha, holiness</i>, into the world, we need to exercise the use of our souls<i>.</i> </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">You can understand this by taking a good look at your neighborhood
cat. Or, maybe at your neighborhood dog. I'm lucky- on my street, I
have more dogs than people, so visualizing the scenario is easy. Could those animals ever be holy? I
don't think so. An animal behaves on impulse. He acts based on his
instincts. There are absolutely no thoughts activating his actions. He
just does what his nature leads him to do. When a cougar attacks someone
and kills them, he's behaving according to his nature. Free choice does
not exist. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">True
holiness and sanctity are brought about by an action as a result of a
thought process. Not by simply following impulses,
but by fighting for the truth, and by making a clear decision to do
something right. Because every time we decide in the affirmative and
therefore do a positive action, we become holier and we bring holiness into
the world. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Now, <i>of course</i> there's <i>kedusha</i> in <i>mitzvos </i>that are <i>bein adam laMakom</i>.
Plenty of it. Those are also human acts that depend on the spiritual
side of a person. But the ultimate in sanctity is dependent on our
behavior in the earthly, worldly activities. On channeling our impulses
and choosing correctly. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">You can take every <i>chumra </i>you've ever heard of upon yourself, and fast every other day, and buy only Glatt kosher and <i>cholov yisrael</i>... but while waiting on line for it you're blabbing <i>loshon horah</i> on your cell phone with one
hand, and with the other, you're elbowing the guy who took <i>your</i>
parking spot, and you're giving the death stare to the lady in front of
you because she took the last fat-free carb-free taste-free potato
knish...well that's a bit oxymoronic, dontcha think? </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1335899113484246">
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">We need to ask ourselves, "Am I holy, or am I holier than thou?"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Big difference.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1335899113484243">So, the <i>chidush</i> over here is that <b>who we really are, and how we rank on our level of spirituality, is based on our behaviors <i>bein adam l'chaveiro.</i></b>
How we speak to others, and how we respect them. Dealing fairly with
others, feeling and showing care and concern, judging favorably, giving <i>tzedakah, </i>giving
our parents the proper honor and respect that they deserve, going the extra mile for someone,
etc... That's how we measure true holiness. That's how we become
sanctified people.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">But we must remember an important factor. All of my actions between man and man, must still be done on God's terms, and not on my own. Because once the mitzvos become dependent on my own emotions, needs, or satisfaction, Im entering the dangerous zone of following the Torah out of convenience and not out of obligation. This leads to Selective Judasim.</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">So,
for all of
you out there who are trying to change the world, here's an idea. Let's
try forgiving someone who wronged us and not bearing a grudge or
not taking revenge, and watch the world transform into one of true
holiness. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful Shabbos,</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span></span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-73980800295477837202014-04-11T15:05:00.001-05:002014-04-12T21:12:10.168-05:00The Message Of Pesach<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">With
sincere apologies to <i>Parshas Acharei Mos</i>, this week we'll be
discussing the upcoming <i>yom tov </i>of <i>Pesach.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">This
is not gonna be one of those ¨Pesach is about cleaning the chametz, not
cleaning the chandelier¨ posts. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">But,
it is true that when simply hearing the word <i>Pesach, </i>many of us
transform into some kind of unrecognizable form of ourselves. Even if the P
word is mentioned in July.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Panic,
anxiety, and hyperventilation creep up on us, and though we try to bury the negative
feelings, sometimes a tad of loathing comes to join the emotional party. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Is
this really what <i>Pesach</i> is supposed to be like? Somehow I don't think God
had intended that this holy and delightful holiday become a turn-off to all
family members living with a harried pre <i>Pesach</i> woman. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: #17365d; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><span style="color: blue;">Our families were not meant to be the <i>karban pesach</i>.</span><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: #17365d; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">We
are commanded to get rid of the <i>chametz. </i>Period. No need to remove the
curtains, paint the house, or go through picture albums from the 80´s. You´re
not missing much anyway in those albums, it´s just a bunch of hairspray</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> <span style="color: blue;">and leg warmers.</span></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">And w</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">hen was the last time you
ate your peanut butter sandwich while hanging from the chandelier? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Exactly.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">So,
I´m going to take just a few minutes to focus on what <i>Pesach</i> <b><i>is </i></b>and
to stay away from what it's <b><i>not.</i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><u><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Pesach,
in a nutshell.</span></u><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Hehe.<b><i>
</i></b></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">The
Jews were set free from two hundred and ten years of bitter slavery. The possuk
writes that they left Egypt <i>bechipazon, in a rush, </i>and if they would not
have left at the exact moment that they did, they would not have been worthy of
leaving at all!</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">At
this point, the Jews as a nation, were on the forty ninth level of impurity.
Had they stayed in that morally depraved country for another minute they
would´ve fallen down to the fiftieth level, the lowest possible one, disabling
their redemption permanently.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Ok.
I have a problem with this. After taking two hundred and
ten years for them to fall down to the forty ninth level, remaining in the curruption for three and a
half seconds longer would cause them to fall down a whole
nother level?</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Rabbi
Akiva Tatz says, it wasn´t the Egyptian influence that would have caused their
descent. The offense would have been an internal one. It would have been the
waiting, itself.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Laziness.
Procrastination. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Had
they decided to first finish the game they were playing, or finish a
conversation with someone, take a nap before the trip, or even finish the bread
they were baking, they would have been guilty of procrastination.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> <span style="color: blue;">They couldn't even stop to take a salvation selfie!</span><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Because that
moment of procrastination would have been a transgression so great that it would have rendered them...and
us...slaves, forever and ever.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">That´s
a frightening thought. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">My
name would probably be Yafhadenijad. I wouldn´t even know how to spell
that.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Bechipazon.
</span></i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">THAT
was the second to act, and not a moment later.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">I
once missed out on an opportunity to suggest a shidduch between two people,
because I moved too slowly. I was very young and felt intimidated to call. I
had this excuse, and that one. On the day that I finally decided to do it,
I heard the news: They had gotten engaged! To each other! </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">I
had lost that irreplaceable mitzvah. And the shadchanus money.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">I
have another question. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">We
all understand the reason we have to eat <i>matzoh </i>on <i>Pesach, </i>but
why do we have to get rid of all the <i>chametz? </i>On <i>sukkos </i>we move
into the<i> sukkah, </i>but we don't have to destroy our homes while
eating in it! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">So
why isn't it enough to just eat <i>matzoh- </i>why are we commanded to get rid
of all the <i>chametz </i>as well?<i> </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">I
have another question. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Why
do we start counting the <i>omer </i>on the second night of Pesach and not on
the first?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Ok,
I´m gonna be very Jewish for a minute, and answer my questions with another
question.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">What's
the difference between <i>chametz </i>and <i>matzah? </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Look
at their spelling. They both have a <i>mem,</i>and<i> tzadi. </i>But their
third letters are different. One has a <i>ches, </i>and the other, a <i>hei. </i>The
difference between a <i>ches </i>and a <i>hei, </i>is just a teeny tiny line.
But that minuscule line is the entire difference between the two.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Now,
check out their ingredients. Flour, and water. They're both made out of the
same exact things. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Being
that both of these items are so similar, it arouses my curiosity that
eating one of them on <i>Pesach </i>is such a great <i>mitzvah, </i>and eating
the other is such a great <i>aveirah.</i> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">So, what
exactly is the <i>halachik</i> difference between the two? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">1-
Time factor. For the <i>matzah </i>to be kosher, it has to be
completely finished within eighteen minutes. Otherwise, it's <i>chametz. </i> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">It
needs to be made immediately. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">No
procrastinating. No being lazy. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">2-
Constant work. As long as the dough is being kneaded consistently, it's good to
go. When you stop kneading it and leave it to sit around, it starts to rise a
bit, causing it to become <i>chametz.</i> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">No
procrastinating. No being lazy.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Everything
in the physical world is mirrored in the spiritual world. Cleaning for physical
crumbs in all the cracks and crevices of the home is meant to reflect cleaning
the hidden corners within ourselves to get rid of spiritual crumbs.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> Matzah
is simple and humble. The only way for it to lose that status is through lack
of movement and work. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">We,
too are born simple and humble. But if we let ourselves sit around, we stop
working on ourselves, and we become <i>chametz.</i> Because when we sit, when
we´re spiritually lazy, we start rising. Our ego's naturally get pumped with
helium. We become arrogant. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Throughout the year we
are obligated to remember our stay in egypt and our negative experience there,
but we can be surrounded by <i>chametz</i></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">
<span style="color: blue;">while doing so. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">On
<i>Pesach, </i>we have to concentrate so intensely on what happened in Egypt,
that we can't be distracted by the <i>chamtez. </i>Nothing can get in the way
of our focus on <i>The message of Pesach. </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">The
message of <i>Pesach </i>is so important that we cannot even focus on the
highlight of history, the essence of who we are, the day of <i>matan
Torah! </i> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">That´s
why we count the <i>omer </i>starting on the second day of <i>Pesach </i>instead
of the first, so that our focus on the seder night can be purely on the message
of the <i>chag.</i></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">The
message of Pesach is <b>TIME MANAGEMENT</b>. </span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Physically,
as well as spiritually, we gotta move immediately and consistently.<i> </i></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Remember
the famous story of Rabbi Akiva? He eventually became the greatest Torah
teacher of all time. But in order to achieve that status, his selfless and
devoted wife, Rochelle, encouraged him to travel to a top yeshiva where he can
study away from home and uninterrupted for twelve years.<i> </i></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">As
arranged, he returned home after being away that long, and as he approached his
house, he heard his wife having a conversation inside with a neighbor. The
neighbor, clearly impressed with her sacrifice and determination, asked her how
she would react if her husband walked through the door and announced that he
wants to return the yeshiva for another twelve years.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Her
response? GO!</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Rabbi
Akiva heard her answer, and without missing a beat, turned 180 degrees, and his
destination became one with his original departure. He stayed at the
yeshiva for another twelve years, becoming the preeminent Torah teacher that he
was, and molding 24,000 students into true <i>talmidei chachamim </i>and future
Torah teachers. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">There´s
one little detail that always bothered me about that very inspiring story. He
didn´t see his wife for twelve flippin years! Couldn´t he just go in and say
hello? Couldn´t he drink a cup of coffee with her before departing again? </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">After
learning about <i>bechipazon, </i>I have my answer. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">No.
He couldn´t. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Had
he gone in to see his wife, he may never have left again.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Rabbi
Akiva knew that he needed to make a split second decision. It´s now or never.
</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">THAT
was the second to act, and not a moment later. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">One
more question, just to fill up your seder with lots of ´em. What does <i>chametz
</i>have to do with the <i>avoda </i>of <i>pesach? </i>Why doesn't <i>chametz </i>interfere
with <i>Rosh Hashana, </i>or <i>Shabbos? </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"> The
only time we have an obligation from the <i>Torah </i>to educate our children,
is at the <i>Pesach seder.</i> As a matter of fact, that is the entire point of
<i>Pesach.</i> <i>V'heegadita l´bincha... Transmission to children. </i> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">At
the <i>seder, </i>we do everything just for the kids to ask and learn. But, <b>a
person cannot transmit when he has <i>gaava, arrogance. </i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"> </span></i></b><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Because an arrogant person doesn't listen to anyone, and therefore
doesn´t learn from anyone. And he can't connect with those that he's teaching. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">A
person can only teach something to others when he has humility.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">And,
this is why, right after we learn the message of <i>Pesach</i> from Rabbi
Akiva, each of his 24,000 students fell sick and left this world. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Why
did they die? They lacked respect for each other. They didn’t hold each other
and each others’ knowledge with the proper esteem and regard.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Because
of that lack of humility and respect, they were unable to properly transmit the
<i>Torah </i>and therefore had
to be disqualified.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Time
management. </span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">The
time is <b>now</b>. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">It
seems like a message so simple and insignificant for a holiday as grand as <i>Pesach</i>. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Simple?
Indeed it is. It´s that little miniscule line causing the <i>hei</i> to become
a <i>ches</i>. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">It´s
that little mitzvah that I lost forever.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">It´s
that little split second decision of doing something now...or perhaps never. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Chametz</span></i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"> or <i>matzah</i>.
Arrogance or humility. Life or death. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
<br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";">Insignificant?
Indeed it is...if you´d rather still be living in Egypt and wearing a vintage
burka. </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif";"> <i>
</i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Btw,
I used blue ink this week because I'm in middle of cleaning out my black ink
cartridge for <i>Pesach. </i></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span><span style="color: blue; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;">Have
a great shabbos and a <i>chag kasher v'sameach.</i></span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: x-large;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-80976175624120614142014-04-04T11:51:00.000-06:002014-04-04T11:52:29.939-06:00The Blessing of Beautiful Eyes<span style="font-size: large;">The eyes are the window to the soul. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">At least that's what people say. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I believe it to be true, though, because when I am with someone who has no distractions to them, when all other body parts are hidden and only their face is exposed, I can see the essence of who they are through their eyes.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">But we're not here to talk about the beauty of modesty and its ironic attraction. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">We're here to talk about a metaphoric eye. Sorta.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">This week's parsha, Metzora, speaks about the epidemic of <i>tzaraat</i>, leprosy. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Tzaraat</i> is a skin malady that is contracted as a result of engaging in any form of gossip. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The parsha discusses its causes, symptoms and purification process.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">As part of the purification process, the kohen has to personally check the wounds and determine whether or not the rash has healed. In reference to that procedure, in a case where the person suffering has not been cured, the possuk writes, "v'henei lo hafoch ha nega et einav", the blemish has not changed its eye. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>The blemish has not changed its eye. </b></i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b><br /></b></i></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Its<i> eye?</i></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Is it just me, or is this wording a little weird? Why can't it just say that the person has not been healed? Or that the ailment has not yet run its course? But, 'the blemish has not changed its <i>eye</i>?'</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Here's what I'm thinking. Since there is not a word in the Torah that is extra, nor are there any mistakes in it, there must be a significant reason why the word <i>ayin, eye,</i> was used here.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">There are many different ways to describe the <i>tzaraat</i>, and interestingly the word that was chosen to refer to the leprosy in this possuk, is <i>nega</i>. <i> </i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Nun, gimel, ayin.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Nega</i> is a bruise, a pain, a discomfort.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">If you change around its letters, you get another Hebrew word which may sound familiar to you: <i>Oneg.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Ayin, nun, gimel.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Oneg means pleasure.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The kohen was not only giving the victim a prognosis; he was teaching him a lesson. He was explaining to him why he has not been cured, and for that matter, why a person contracts this condition in the first place.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">What's the reason we speak loshon horah? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The deeper, more introspective reasons are connected to issues of low self esteem, jealousy, and other emotional packages we have weighing us down. But since I don't get paid by the hour, I'm not getting into all that psychology right now.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I'm going to discuss the very basic cause of gossip. The reason we gossip is so simple, it's often totally overlooked. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">We speak <i>loshon horah </i>because we are looking at our target with negativity. We are looking at life, at people, at situations, through a lense tinted with negativity, judgement, and pessimism.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Think negative, speak negative, feel negative. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Think positive, speak positive, feel positive.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It's the War of the Worlds: </span><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;">Ayin Tov vs Ayin Ra. </span></i><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It's more than just an abstract idea. How do I actually begin to feel positive towards another person? It's about judging favorably. Giving the benefit of the doubt even when your version seems far fetched and unlikely. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It's about forgiveness. Forgiving others for making mistakes, for being human, for reacting out of their own insecurities and uncertainties. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It's about celebrating others' triumphs and successes. Being genuinely happy for them when they share their good news, when they get promoted, or when they purchase a gorgeous pair of shoes that you can't afford.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> It means removing grudges and jealousy, and always judging people favorably.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Our reaction to life, to people, and to situations is completely controlled by our view and perception.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Viewing the world with an <i>ayin tov, a positive eye, </i>can make life a much more pleasant place for us, as well as for all the people around us. It will also attract positivity into our lives. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It's all about perception.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Rain.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Is rain a good thing or a bad thing?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Well, that depends who you ask. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">For a farmer, it's the biggest blessing in the world. For a girl who just walked out of the salon after spending an hour on her hair, it is not such a blessing.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Having a positive disposition in life will not change your circumstances. But it <i>will </i>allow you to cope with anything that comes your way. And it <i>will</i> affect your mood, your reaction, and your quality of life.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">So, let's take the word <i>nega</i>. Now, take the word <i>oneg</i>. There is only one tiny difference between these two: It all depends where you put the <i>ayin</i>.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">A person can choose to have a life of<i> nega.</i> A life of pain, discomfort, and negativity. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Or, a person can choose to have a life of <i>oneg</i>. A life of pleasure, enjoyment, and positivity.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">There is only one tiny difference between these two lives: It all depends where you put your<i> ayin.</i></span> <br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span>Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-20556187952751030242014-03-28T16:19:00.000-06:002014-03-28T16:19:37.101-06:00How Do I Know What My Mission Is?<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Is it just me or do you also save the best food on your plate for last? I know it's not just me. But I think I figured out the original source for this behavior. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The possuk says, אשה כי תזריע וילדה זכר, A woman conceives and gives birth to a boy. The significance of this is to teach us the laws of purity and impurity, and that after she gives birth she will be impure for seven days. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Reish Lakish takes this possuk and refers us back to the time of creation, when a human being was initially created. If you go through the story of that era, you will notice that only after every creation was brought to life was the human created. And since all the creations are here to serve the human, it seems odd that they appear before him. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Before we get to the point, realize that man was created chronologically last. Because God saved the best for last. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And I'm not kidding. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Because although we were created last, we are first in importance. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The human is the epitome of the world. The crown of creation. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">So why are we last? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Reish Lakish explains the importance of this order. He says that if a person uses his full potential in life, then he earns his place as first in importance, but if not, then even a lowly worm precedes him. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Um. Say what? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Seriously? A worm can come out ahead of me? No matter what I do with my life, aren't I way above an insignificant little worm?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Actually, no. The greater the creation, the greater its potential. A lowly earthworm was created to slither around on its tummy and eat dirt. Just by existing it fulfills its potential. Obviously the potential that I possess is so much greater, and therefore so much harder to reach. So, if it is not reached, then the worm comes out ahead simply because he has fulfilled his mission and I didn't. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Pretty embarrassing. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">So we need to understand how to reach those heights that we were made to reach. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">There are some people who work just to eat and then eat just to have energy to work. They work to make a living and then live just to work for that living. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And that's it. That's their entire purpose of existence. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Then there are those who realize that they have an important tool that's needed in order to make the world a better place when they leave it than when they entered it. And they wanna know how to do that. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">I get asked this question at least every week. "How do I know what my mission is? How do I know if I'm fulfilling my potential?"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And this is what I tell them. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">We have two missions in life. The first is תיכון עולמי and the second is תיכון עצמי. We need to perfect the world, and perfect ourselves. And we need to do both at the same time. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Look inside yourself and become familiar with everything you see there. Learn about your strengths and weaknesses. What makes me tick? What makes me laugh? What makes me feel frustrated? Satisfied? Warm and fuzzy? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Am I a people person? Am I an organizer? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Once we know what our talents are and which things speak to us, we look around at our families, communities, and even at the world, and see what we can contribute to them based on their needs and on our abilities. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Then, while focusing on the positive and starting to make a real difference in the world, we need to return inside ourselves and perfect our weaknesses as well. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Focusing solely on our shortcomings causes frustration and depression. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Focusing solely on our strengths encourages arrogance and complacency. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It needs to be a joint effort. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">How long does it take to get there? As long as you're still in this world, there's more to do. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">אשר ברא אלוקים לעשת</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Hashem created this world to DO. To accomplish. To fix. To create. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Wanna take a rest? When you get to the next world. There you can rest. In peace. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span><br />
<div>
<br /></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-42372185826181779382014-03-21T15:30:00.000-06:002014-03-21T15:30:14.594-06:00Hard is Bad, Easy is Good. Right?<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">There is a common denominator between two of the big topics
discussed in the parsha this week. Parshas Shmini speaks about the sudden death
of the two holy sons of Aharon, and then it moves on to the laws of kashrut,
the foods that are permissible and prohibited for us to consume. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The common denominator between the two, is one word. One word with
lots of exclamation points and question marks. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-size: large;">WHY?!?!?!</span></b></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Why do good people die young?</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Why do bad things even happen to good people? Shouldn’t the
good be rewarded with good and the bad be rewarded with bad? Isn’t that just
logical?</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">While we’re on the topic of suffering... why can’t I eat my
ice cream right after my chicken?! I gotta eat dessert six hours after my
meal? </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">One thing I’ll tell you for sure: keeping kosher is the best
diet out there. There is no nutritionist in the world who can get me to wait
six hours to eat my ice cream.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">But…why?</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">When Aharon found out about the deaths of his sons, he
reacted by remaining silent. How can a human being possess that amount of inner
strength, to accept such deep pain and such terrible suffering as God’s will, without
even a question or a doubt?</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Aharon had no doubt in his mind or heart that Hashem runs
the world, and that everything He does is for our best. He knew it was a package
deal. He knew that if Hashem is in charge of the good times, he is also there in
the hard times. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I’m not going to expand upon the topic of faith now, nor am
I going to discuss the important point about us humans not completely
understanding what good is and what bad is. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">We tend to associate something <i>hard </i>with something <i>bad,</i>
and something <i>easy</i> with something <i>good</i>.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Many times it’s actually the opposite. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Eating an extra piece of chocolate cake is easy. Working out
at the gym is hard.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Which is good for me, and which is bad? </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">The first thing we need to realize is that just because
something is hard, it doesn’t make it bad, and just because something is easy,
by no means is it automatically good.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I believe that Aharon was trying to teach
us a vital message. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Every day we find ourselves entangled in a conflict of
wills. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>My will</i> versus <i>His will.</i> <span> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Emotions</i> versus<i> intellect</i>.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Body</i> versus <i>soul.</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If every time I choose right over wrong I get a hundred
dollars deposited into my bank account, I will obviously keep choosing good. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If every time I speak loshon horah my tongue freezes for an
hour, I will likely not choose that path again.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">If I get repaid with obvious good for every good deed, or suffer openly
each time I choose wrongly, I will no longer be functioning through free will.
None of my decisions will have a moral backing. I will always choose good to
get rewarded or to avoid getting punished, but my choice will have nothing to
do with my desire to do or be good.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">In order to maintain a world of true freedom, there have to
be situations that appear random, that are difficult to understand. <span> </span>If God were predictable or comprehensible,
what kind of God would He be? </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">He gave us life, and along with it the opportunity to live
it the way we choose to. The way to happiness is through choices and challenges.
Through mistakes, regret, and growth.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span> </span>Repaying good with
immediate and obvious good, and bad with immediate and obvious bad will remove all of our
free will from the world, and diminish challenges and satisfaction. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">There have been an excess amount of tragedies over the past
few weeks, and Aharon’s message could not have come at a better time. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">No, we don’t understand these tragedies. But we’re not supposed
to. <span> </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Aharon taught us through his acceptance and unwavering
faith, that belief in Hashem is a package deal. He is in charge of the positive
as well as the negative. And it’s done on purpose, to allow us to live our
lives the way <b><i>we</i> </b>choose to live them, and to experience the highest level of
growth and happiness through it.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Now, what does all of this have to do with my ice cream?</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Mitzvos are not always convenient, nor are they easy to do.
Respecting a mitzvah only when it’s convenient for us is egotistical and lowers its
level of greatness. But keeping it when we don’t understand it, or when we don’t
like it too much, raises it to a level of altruism and allows us to follow the
Torah without any ulterior motives, and for one reason only:</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Because <b>GSS</b>.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">God Said So.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Period.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">So, I don’t understand why I can’t eat ice cream after meat,
and it isn’t easy to tie up my vocal chords in front of men, and it’s
inconvenient to cover my knees at the beach. But it’s a package deal. Hashem is
in charge, and having proper <i>bitachon</i> means knowing without a shadow of a doubt
that everything He does and everything He asks of us is for our good. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos!</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-60760029603325426852014-03-07T11:33:00.002-06:002014-03-07T11:40:53.381-06:00Obligation vs Voluntary<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">One day, when *my sister was a teenager, she walked into *her room and
noticed it was in a state of mild disaster. She decided right then that she
will not make any plans that day until her room is spotless. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">A moment later, my
mom passed by and, poking her head in she said to her, “what a pigsty! Please
clean up your room immediately!” She replied in the negative and marched out of
her room. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">In just a split second, she went from feeling tremendous desire to tremendous
defiancy and shoulder shrugging. What had changed?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"> It had become an obligation. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">When something goes from voluntary to obligatory, our level of desire and
motivation completely changes.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">*names and places have been changed to protect the innocent. #cough
#itsjustphlegm</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Many of the
offerings described in Parshas Vayikra are completely voluntary in nature. If
these mitzvot are so important, why isn't their performance obligatory, and if they aren't, for what purpose did God give them?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Human
beings are pleasure-seekers. Most people seek pleasure in careers, vacations, cars,
homes, shoes…and we tend to grumble about obligations as unpleasant
aggravations. We don´t like to be tied down to responsibility. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">The Sages
say: "Greater is someone who does a good deed by being commanded, than one
who does so voluntarily." Why? Because when we're obligated, our desire
for independence makes us resistant. It activates the yetzer hara. So if we can overcome that to perform the
good deed, then we're a bigger person because of it.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">God made
certain mitzvot optional, because if they were obligatory, performing them
would not be accompanied by the same sense of donating one's time and energy
for the sake of God and would not produce the same result.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">The mitzvah
of bringing sacrifices is discussed in such great detail, signifying their importance,
and yet they are only voluntary. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"> This has taught me two important lessons. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">The first
thing I realized is that I will not be inviting any animal rights activists for
Shabbos.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">And the
second lesson is the importance of changing my perspective on obligations. Obligations
can be and should be pleasurable and fulfilling. They actualize our potential.
They are the basis of our self esteem. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">It may be
difficult to fulfill obligations, but there's tremendous pleasure in accomplishing what has to get done. It´s energizing.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Think of an
example of the tiniest amount of pleasure you get from fulfilling a seemingly
insignificant obligation. Like, returning the extra five dollars to the store
after they miscalculated your change. You leave the store with your head held
so high, you almost end up in a back bend. Now try to imagine the feeling
involved in fulfilling a much greater obligation!</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">What
determines whether we view obligations as a cause for distress, or as a
delight?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Whether we view ourselves primarily as a
"body" or as a "soul."</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Bodies do
not like obligations, because they require effort. The body would rather be on
vacation. The body wants to sit on the couch all day, eating potato chips and
watching Seinfeld reruns.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Souls
thrive on obligations. It gives a sense of importance, dignity, eternity.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">We need to
figure out what's really important in life. When we have that clarity, then we're
willing to ignore the body's complaints and listen to the yearnings of the
soul. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span lang="EN-US">That's</span></i><span lang="EN-US"> when we will identify with the
soul's desire to fulfill obligations and feel the satisfaction and fulfillment
it brings.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">I will now
go finish voluntarily cooking for my obligation of Shabbos, before all my food
becomes a burnt offering.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Have a
beautiful Shabbos!</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Yaffa</span></span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-21235743627214199192014-02-28T12:20:00.001-06:002014-02-28T12:56:02.080-06:00It´s Only A Stupid Detail<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<![endif]--><span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Today, in
just three short sentences, I´m going to share my tips for being a successful
businessperson:</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Don´t. Be. Me.
</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">I have a
knack for starting businesses. Not because I like to buy and sell, but because
I like people. So, my business pursuits are always related to local needs. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">The problem
is, none of the commerce I have engaged in has ever lasted long enough for me
to even earn back the money I´ve laid out to open it. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Now, I´m
not like this in any other area of my life, so what am I doing wrong in my
business dealings? I carry top of the line, gorgeous, trendy products. I always
choose cute, catchy names. My latest entrepreneural attempt was a hair
accessory store called ´Bandana Republic.´ I know, right?!</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">So, wherein
lies my downfall? It doesn´t lie as much in my brutal honesty in telling
customers when something doesn’t suit them, as it does in my hopeless ability to
keep proper records of incoming and outgoing merchandise, or keeping
any fiscal accounts. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"> I realized all of this while studying Parshas
Pikudei. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Pikudei
literally means<i> the sum, </i>and in it, the Torah makes an
account and summary of all the materials, donations, vessels and objects used
in making and in being a part of the Sanctuary. This Torah portion is the last one
in the book of Shemos, and by summarizing all the details of the past parshios,
it teaches a few important lessons, which I´ll share with you now. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">The first is the importance of taking inventory; whether physically or spiritually. Where
am I holding? What have I accomplished? Where have I failed? How can I be more
successful? How can I improve? Asking ourselves these questions at the end of
the day, week or month is the first step to success.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">The second
lesson I´ve learned this week is about the importance of details. Details seem so
insignificant; but are they? Two weeks ago, as I´m sure you noticed (if you didn’t
notice, please make believe you did) I didn´t post anything about the
Parsha. It wasn´t because I forgot about it, nor was it because I had nothing
to write. I actually sat at my desktop researching, learning, thinking, writing,
and editing…for hours. Then suddenly, while I was rereading and about to save
it, my two year old just marched over and pulled out the plug. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">And all my
brilliance disappeared. Just. Like. That.
</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Of course,
I blamed it on God, assuming He probably didn´t like my awesome connection
between Ki Sisa and Valentine´s Day. But really, it was my own fault for
forgetting one teeny, tiny detail. The icon in the top left corner of the page,
known as ´Save.´ </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Details are
a lot more important than we realize.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">A parent has an obligation to nourish and
protect their child. That would mean giving them bread, water, a pair of shoes,
an outfit, a coat, and a roof. Do we know any parent that stops at their obligation?
We give a lot more than that. Because, what teaches a person that we love them
and care about them, are the details. Gifts, compliments, unexpected and unnecessary
sweet gestures….</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"> Of course even those can be given out of
obligation and without a connection to the heart. Therefore, even more
important than <i>what </i>we say, do, or
give, is <i>how </i>we say, do or it give
it. A friend of mine refers to compliments as wrapping paper, because the
outside is not JUST a detail- it is just as important as the gift itself.
</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Taking the
time to give sincere, specific praise to someone, can be life changing.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Relationships
are often taken for granted. We just assume that that friend, spouse, boss, employee…will
always be there. I need to ask myself, Am I skating by my relationships by just
doing the bare minimum? By fulfilling my obligations? Or am I putting thought
and detail into the things I say and do? Am I considering the other person´s
best intentions when I give to them, or am I concerned with my own? Am I paying
attention to their needs? <i>Really </i>paying
attention? </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">How many of
us hold back compliments <i>just because</i>?
</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span lang="EN-US">That´s</span></i><span lang="EN-US"> detail.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Bare in mind,
of course, that accounting for everything can also lead to pettiness, so we need
to focus the attention to detail on the positive side of the middah. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Another significant lesson we learn from our
theme of accounting for everything, is, in my opinion the most important
characteristic for a person to possess, and that is the middah of <b><i>hakarat
hatov,</i></b> recognition of goodness or kindness being done to us and being
grateful for it. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">What made
the mishkan so beautiful? The unity, the selfless donations, the work, sweat
and tears that people put into it. That accounting of every single material
used, every item donated, every ounce of energy and effort…might all be
mentioned just to teach us the art of gratitude. Was the woman who donated one
earring to the mishkan insignificant? (The OCD in me really hopes she donated the
other one shortly after.) No. Her tiny donation made her just as important as
the woman who donated a big copper mirror. Every single action, every little
kindness should be remembered and appreciated. Who knows? That little earring
may be what holds the entire kiyor together!</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">We may not
realize it, but every little detail, no matter how seemingly insignificant, can
actually be playing a very important role in our lives. I came to this realization
the time I spent an entire night with a mosquito in my bed.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Next time
you catch yourself thinking that that little compliment on your tongue is just
silly and no big deal to hold back, remember how your seemingly
inconsequential words are actually quite consequential, and can literally
change the recipient´s day, week…or even their life. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">What to do
if the compliment is not on your tongue? If you haven´t even thought of giving
one? </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">That can be
learned by the next lesson of accounting. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">A few weeks
ago the Jews cheated on God by building the Golden calf. That betrayal had
broken a level of trust between God and us, and quite deservingly so. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">But, instead
of reaching for the gun, God concentrated instead on the good they were doing
for Him and for His mishkan. He made an accounting of all the materials and
donations and work force, because we need to learn the value of forgiveness and
moving forward. Even after we stabbed Him in the back, He still allowed us to
go ahead and build that Sactuary. The Sactuary that is God´s home; so holy and
intimate.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Right away,
he trusted us again. He believed in us and in our relationship with Him. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">So, Hashem
made an accounting in the Torah, to teach us that sometimes people screw up,
they do bad things…really bad…but instead of focusing on that negative action
or on the hurt feelings, we should turn our focus to other details. To the good
details. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">If someone
wrongs me, I need remove myself from the negativity, move forward, and focus on
the accounting of the positive attributes of that person. This can be very difficult
because even if some good is found, our nature is to let the negative shine
through. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">So, the message is that in order to find that goodness, we need to go
so far to focus on the positive, that we should become petty about it! Become
petty about every good detail. Remember every little good thing they have ever done
to you and for you.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">After
reaching this level, you think you might have a compliment or two on your
tongue?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">And now, here´s
my account and summary of my post. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Pekudei. Personal inventory. Accountings. Details.
Forgiveness. Positive focus. Sincere compliments. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">And most
importantly, I learned to save my work on the computer. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">It´s all in
the details.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Have a
beautiful Shabbos!</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span lang="EN-US">Yaffa</span></span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-19464487907985546332014-02-21T15:45:00.001-06:002014-02-21T17:19:38.980-06:00Follow Your Nose<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">I'm going to share a secret with you. If
you're trying to sell your home, right before a potential buyer
arrives, knead together a fluffy dough, and put it in the oven to bake.
As the viewer come inside, the delicious aroma of fresh bread will
enter his nostrils, bringing a message to the brain that this is a
homey, comfortable house, which might ultimately lead him to buy it. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">We often come in contact with the sense
of seeing, the sense of hearing, as well as the senses of touch and
taste. How many times has the sense of <i>smell</i> been acknowledged? Let's get in touch a bit with our smelling sensation.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The <i>Torah </i>speaks a lot about the <i>korbanos</i>, describing them as a <i>REIACH NICHOACH for Hashem.</i> By wording it like this, the <i>possuk</i> seems to indicate that there must be something spiritual about <i>smell.</i> </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">You probably think I'm about to tell you what a holy, spiritual, enlightening, and inspiring concept <i>smell</i> is. Don't hold your breath. I'm not even sure yet where I'm going with this. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> Here's was I know about <i>smell</i>. Our sense of smell is 10,000 times more
sensitive than any other of our senses and recognition of smell is immediate.
Other senses like touch and taste must travel through the body via neurons
and the spinal cord before reaching the brain whereas the olfactory response
is immediate, extending directly to the brain without an intermediary. To see, we need the use of our eyeball lenses. To hear, we need the vibrations in our eardrums. <i>Smelling</i> is the only place where
our central nervous system is directly exposed to the environment.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The smelling sensation just goes straight to the brain.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Chaza"l</i> tell us that a <i>talmid chacham</i> is compared to the <i>Arzei halelvonon,</i> a type of tree. Why? Rav Adler from Baltimore said once that it's because by the <i>arzei halevonon,</i> not only do the flowers release a delicious smell, but the branches and leaves do as well. When a <i>talmid chacham </i>does <i>mitzvos, </i>of course they're done beautifully and sweetly. But the insight over here is that when a person is a <i>talmid chacham, </i>then
even his regular and mundane activities are done with beauty and
emanate a certain sweetness. The way he talks, walks, deals in
business...everything has a delicious smell. Not only the <i>maasim tovim.</i> </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
Why am I saying that his <i>mitzvos </i>and <i>maasim tovim </i>are compared to the smell of the fruits of the tree? Cuz the <i>essrog, </i>which smells incredibly good is compared by <i>chaza"l </i>to the <i>maasim tovim </i>of a person.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">There is another topic discussed in the <i>parsha </i>this
week. It's something especially applicable to the lucky members of the
female species, but the lesson is for everyone. No, I'm not having an
ADD moment; we'll connect the two topics in a minute. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The gorgeous, shiny <i>kiyor </i>in the <i>mishkan</i>, as everyone knows, was crafted by using the famous mirrors of the women in <i>Mitzraim.</i> </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Why were these mirrors worthy of being used for the holy <i>kiyor?</i>
Because of the reason the women used them. They didn't sit and stare
at themselves all day to make sure every hair was in place, and all the
spare tires are tucked in tight. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> These righteous women had a plan. Their husbands were tired and
depressed from the backbreaking labor they were busy with all day. They
looked at the future in darkness. The light at the
end of the tunnel had burned out. They wanted to discontinue life. They
couldn't allow children to be born into such misery. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">But, their brilliant, holy wives realized that even though the light was out, <i>it will </i>shine brightly again one day. And then they would regret not doing the <i>mitzvah </i>of <i>peru urevu- having children</i>. So they decided that the only way to fix up the situation was to seduce their husbands to make them want to fulfill this<i> mitzvah</i>.
So they put on makeup, and flirted, and using the mirrors,
they pointed out to them how beautiful they looked. Obviously, it
worked. And this is why those mirrors are so holy. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Because in the world we live in, there's a time and place for everything<i>. Hashem</i> <i> </i>put
into the nature of a woman, the ability to flirt and seduce.
Unfortunately it's usually used, and therefore viewed, as something
negative. But in reality it's not at all something to be denied and
deleted. God gave it to us to use in the right time and the right place,
which is what those women in Egypt realized. Their intentions were
pure. Their motivation was directed upward. And they used their
abilities <i>l'sheim shomayim.</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1331909353868187">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1331909353868187">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1331909353868184">And that's with everything God gave us. Our duty in life is to take the regular, mundane things, and elevate them. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1331909353868187">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1331909353868184"><b>To turn <i>neutral</i> into <i>good</i>. </b> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1331909353868184"> Like the <i>Talmid chacham.</i> Even the regular and the mundane is sweet. The whole tree smells good, not just the fruits and flowers.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span>
<br />
<div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Look at that, we made it holy. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos,</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
</div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"></span>Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-39254601025435085712014-02-07T13:31:00.000-06:002014-02-07T13:31:05.115-06:00Paving My Road With Diamonds<span style="font-size: large;">They say that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Since I´m not planning on retiring there, I´m quite disinterested in its architecture. How come no one ever tells us what the road to heaven is paved with? <i>That</i> is what I wanna know.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And <i>that </i>is what we will find out in the parsha this week.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Parshas Tetzaveh dedicates most of its pages to fashion and design.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Well, kinda. The specific styles it speaks about are vintage clothing, retro design, and ancient architecture. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Moshe was commanded to make garments for the <i>Kohanim</i>. Included in these was the <i>ephod</i>, a piece of clothing similar to an apron, with two straps on top holding the <i>avnei shoham</i>, precious stones, encased in gold. Hashem told Moshe to engrave the names of all the twelve <i>shevatim</i> onto the stones as a remembrance of them, so that every time the <i>Kohain Gadol</i> did the <i>avodah,</i> Hashem would remember the righteousness of the tribes. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">So, here´s my question:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Seriously? The <i>shevatim?</i> Those <i>shevatim</i> have caused so much drama and commotion in the past, and, granted they have made the parsha stories captivating and suspenseful, but aren´t we supposed to leave them in the past and get on with our uncomplicated lives? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The <i>avodah</i> of the <i>Kohain Gadol </i>is vital and highly sensitive; the world's very existence depends upon it. As a result, there are many items that are avoided in the<i> avodah</i> so as not to bring up even the faintest memories of sin. While there is no question that the <i>shevatim</i> were men of extraordinary greatness, that greatness was also tainted by their sins. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Whether it was Reuven being impulsive and making poor decisions, or Shimon and Levi's aggression and deceit, or the collaborative conspiracy of selling their brother, they seemed to have been far from perfect. And even though they had a rationale for what they did, they still plotted and carried out an attempt to kill Yosef, one of the greatest <i>tzadikim</i> in the history of mankind. Didn't that sin permanently affect who they were? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Shouldn't that be reason enough not to have their names engraved on the holiest and most critical chest in the world? </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The issue is based on a matter of perspective. A diamond is an object of beauty, yet even a minor imperfection can greatly devalue it. A small flaw can transform a priceless gem into an almost worthless stone. However, not every flaw destroys a diamond's value.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Imagine I would place two diamonds in front of you. One is a beautifully cut jewel with a minor flaw, and the other the same as the first, but flawless. A perfect diamond. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Looking at them both, wouldn't it be safe for you to assume that the flawless diamond is more valuable than the other one?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Now, if we bring in a diamond expert to appraise the two diamonds, we would be surprised to hear that there is actually a huge difference between them; but that the diamond with the minor flaw is worth a fortune while the perfect one is almost valueless- because it's a fake. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>One of the signs that a diamond is real, is that it has a flaw. While it may be a very minor imperfection and almost unnoticeable, all genuine diamonds have flaws. </b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>The only perfect diamonds we can find are made of cubic zirconium, and are therefore costume jewelry and fake. </b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Same thing with the human. Man was not<b> </b>created to be perfect. Perfection rests in the realm of <i>malachim.</i> An angel never sins, and therefore an angel is perfect. But <i>malachim, </i>in all their perfection, cannot determine their destiny. They have one job to do with no option of not doing it. Therefore, they have no free will, no challenges, and no growth. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Only man was given the opportunity to determine his destiny either by becoming the greatest of all or by sinking to the lowest of all.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">How do I create who I would be for eternity? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">With the gift of free will. Now, free will doesn't mean the theoretical ability to choose; it means being put into situations where two choices are viable and both options are real. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I need to be challenged. To allow for that, I need to be tempted to choose either good or bad and be given the ability to make mistakes. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The idea of living without mistakes or without sin is not very probable and is not an ideal to strive for.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Actually, looking back in history, there have been four human beings who have never sinned. (I almost made the list, but messed it up just last week. And it wasn't even my fault.)</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Who were these four perfect humans I speak of? </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Amram</i>, Moshe Rabeinu's father</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Yishai</i>, Dovid Hamelech's father</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Binyamin</i>, Yosef Hatzadik's brother</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Kilav</i>, Shlomo Hamelech's brother</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Now tell me, who became greater leaders and people in their lifetimes, the non-sinners or their relatives?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Amram or Moshe?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Yishai or Dovid?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Binyamin or Yosef?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Kilav or Shlomo?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The people who have reached the highest ranks of greatness were not the ones who were perfect. We can only reach greatness through mistakes, through challenges, and through embracing our flaws. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">At the end of his days, man is not measured by how much he has sinned. He is measured by how great he has become. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">So, the <i>shevatim </i>were men of unimaginable greatness, but they also had flaws which caused them to sin. They were huge, beautiful, real diamonds- with flaws.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">When viewing a diamond, you can't see the flaw unless you look through a jewelers loop that magnifies the stone by a power of ten times or more. It can only be perceived through direct scrutiny, and not by the naked eye. All the eye can see is its beauty.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">While the blemishes will always be there, so will the shining brilliance of the jewel. One does not cancel out the other; its flaw isn't eliminated, nor is its brilliance eradicated. Both will always be there, because both <i>have to</i> be there.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I am a beautiful diamond with a flaw. And so are you.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">And now I know all about the road to heaven. It is paved with error, sins, <i>teshuva,</i> and the next level of error.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Who knew it was that easy?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span>Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-54977744215132225032014-01-10T15:11:00.002-06:002014-01-10T15:30:19.933-06:00Fear Of Change<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">There was a study done in the
United States a few years ago. The results were astonishing.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Since I don't remember the
percentage in numbers, I won't make believe I know them. But what I do
recall very clearly is this: A large majority of adults are more afraid
to move to a different city, and start a new job, meet new neighbors,
make new friends,..... than they are of dying. </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Were the statistics similar in Egypt, 3300 years ago?</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">The <i>possuk </i>writes <i>VACHAMUSHIM ALU B'NEI YISROEL M'ERETZ MITZRAIM.</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"> <i>Rashi </i>explains that <i>Vachamushim </i>means that only one fifth of the Jewish people left <i>Mitzraim</i>. What happened to the other four fifths? Four fifths of the Jewish people did <i>not </i>leave <i>Mitzraim</i>, since they got killed during the <i>makah </i>of <i>choshech- darkness.</i> Why were they killed? Because they didn't want to leave <i>Mitzraim. </i>They were happy and comfortable where they were. They were used to their lives, and just didn't want to leave. </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">How dare I accuse them of such an attitude? </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"> </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"><i>Rashi, </i>in <i>Parshat Bahalotcha</i> writes that after the redemption,</span><span style="font-size: medium;">
on their way to receive the Torah, they had the easiest, most relaxing
lives one can ever imagine. They strolled through the desert, received
food from the sky, no need to shop, no need to cook, no need to work
for a living, no looking for parking, no gaining weight (!!!)... . I
mean, after 210 years of slavery, man, this was the life! This defines
freedom! </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">But yet, what happened? Were they full of gratitude? Were they overwhelmed with love for their Savior? It doesnt seem so. In <i>Parshat Bahalotcha </i>Rashi<i> </i> describes the kvetches<i> </i>and complaints of the Jewish people in the desert. They cried out to Moshe that they want to go back to Egypt! </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">They said they wanted to turn around and head straight back to Egypt... where they had <i>free fish<i>. </i></i><i></i> </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Free fish? Are they serious?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Yup, you heard right. Those were the exact words.They didn't like the <i>munn</i> thing- they wanted more items on the menu. They wanted to go back to where they got <i>fish for free.</i> </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Didn't we all learn this story at least 30 times since we were born? In <i>Miztraim</i>
they were slaves. They did back breaking work. They sweated their
pores dry. They got beaten. Why on earth did they want to go back to that place, and why in heaven did they claim that they had fish
for free there? They didn't even get straw for free, how could they
have gotten free sushi?! </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"><i>Rashi</i> answers: <i>CHINAM MIN HAMITZVOS, THEY WERE FREE FROM THE MITZVOS. </i><br />
Wow. Do you get what this means? </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Even
though while residing in Egypt they worked themselves ragged,
their lives were so bitter, they had no rights, they were beaten to
a pulp, and they just lived in misery...<b>they still preferred to go back to that</b> <b>living hell, rather than have to change their lifestyle</b>.
They chose slavery over freedom; over a life of following the Torah.
They were too afraid of all the responsibilities that come along with
this lifestyle.</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"> Why? How could they do something so stupid? Easily. Even though their lives in <i>Mitzraim</i>
were miserable, they were still so accustomed to living that way, that
they'd rather remain slaves, where it's 'comfortable', than have
an better life, but have to make major changes to enjoy it. </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">This
sounds strange. Are they all victims of self injury?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">But the
painful truth is that we all, in some way, make the same self
destructive decisions sometimes.</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">I've
been acquainted with kids who have developed anxiety at the thought of
moving up to high school. Their fears advance at the start of college.
Sometimes the anxiety is so powerful that it actually blocks them
from applying or attending university, which obviously causes them to
remain with a limited level of education. </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">There
are also those that are offered promotions in their carreers, but
decline due to the fear of leaving their hometown and having to make new
lifestyle adjustments. Therefore, they remain mediocre instead of
advancing. They'd choose to stay at a lower position, and lower income,
rather than make any changes.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"><br />
Unfortunately, there are people who choose to remain victims in abusive
relationships, even with opportunities to leave, due to those same
fears. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;"><br />
The <i>munn</i> that the Jews recieved in the <i>midbar</i>, came with strings attached. They can have it... but they have to start keeping the <i>mitzvos</i> now. The fish that they got in <i>Mitzraim </i>was <i>FREE!!</i> No responsibilities. No obligations. No changes.</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1328055686178172">
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1328055686178169" style="font-size: medium;">Although
we might be tempted at times to stay where we are, whether in a
physical, emotional, or spiritual sense, in order to avoid change and
adjustment, running away from the 'fear of the unknown', we have to
realize that such behavior will cause us to remain in whatever state we
are (if not a lower one)... forever. We will go nowhere and become no
one. </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Changing
a behavior or a mindset creates a challenge. Challenge creates
growth. Achievement and greatness comes from accepting the
responsibilities that a life of meaning is offering. </span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Without enduring change and growth, we are opting for a life of slavery. Bad move.</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">"If you do things the same way you've always done them, you'll get the same outcomes you've always gotten".</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Have a beautiful shabbos,</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: medium;">Yaffa </span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-30344705230807892842014-01-03T11:35:00.001-06:002014-01-03T12:08:30.181-06:00One Day I'll Stop Procrastinating<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534966">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534965">You know those people who always arrive at their appointments exactly on time? <br />
You invite them for dinner at 7:00, and the clock strikes seven
simultaneously with the doorbell. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534966">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534965">They show up at weddings before the <i>chosson</i> and <i>kallah. </i></span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534966">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534965">They complete all their tasks ahead of the deadline.</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534966">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534965">Know the type?</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534966">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534965">When I become the type, you will have your parsha post ready each week before shabbos starts. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534988">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534988">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534987">The concept of <b>TIME</b> is a significant one. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534988">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534987">Time can be used positively, as well as negatively. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534996">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_132767541534995">Using time <i>negatively</i> means being <i>lazy.</i> Being lazy is a debilitating disease. It prevents a person from reaching a
goal. Be it a household chore, a project at work, a spiritual activity,
or just about anything that requires some movement. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349106">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349105">Using time <i>positively </i>allows productivity and accomplishment to be your primary goal.</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349119">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349119">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349118"> </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349134">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349133">The exact second that the Jews left<i> </i>Egypt was an extremely significant second. The word <i>b'chipazon</i> means that they left in a rush, at that instant. Had the Jews stayed even <i>one second</i> longer, they would not have been worthy of leaving. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349134">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349133">That means, had we remained there for one more instant after being set free, instead of scurrying out immediately, we would still be living there, wearing burkas and eating lachmajin. I probably would spell my name, Yaphah. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349134">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349133"> </span><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349133"> </span><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349133"> </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349164">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349148">At this time, they were on the forty ninth level of impurity,<i> </i>out
of fifty. I'm no mathematician and even <i>I</i> can count that low. Had they waited even one more second before walking out the gates of
Egypt, they would've hit rock bottom. They would've reached the fiftieth
level of impurity.</span><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349163"> </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349164">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349164">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349163">Here's my question. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349164">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349163">What was so dangerous about remaining another minute in Egypt?<i> </i> Can one extra minute of living with the Egyptians influence them negatively? They had been living side by side for over 200 years, what new trends could they possibly teach them a second before they leave?</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349174">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349173">And besides, wasn't this the moment of redemption? A moment of purity? Of
revelation? It was such a holy moment. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349174">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349173">How could they possibly have
fallen down into a level of <i>impurity</i> in just one split second during the holiest occasion ever?</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349187">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349187">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349186">See, the danger was <i>time, </i>itself<i>.</i> Being lazy. Not acting immediately. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349196">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349195"><i>That's</i><b id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349194"> </b>the impurity. Laziness. Procrastination. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349211">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349210">When given their exit visas, had they remained at home to
finish a game of candy crush before leaving, had they stopped to take a salvation selfie, or run back home to change
into their favorite outfit.... <i>that</i> would've been the danger. <i>That</i> is the impurity.</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349455">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349454">When we're given an opportunity to do something, the moment to do it is <i>right then</i>. If we wait even one moment, we can miss it.</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349468">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349468">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349467">A
few years ago, I thought of the most perfect shiduch. I actually
didn't know either one of them too well, but whatever I did know
seemed perfect. So, what does the president of the Procrastinators Club
do? She doesn't pick up the phone and suggest it. I had every excuse
in the world to wait a little while. </span><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349467">They were both in camp... I didn't
know how to reach them...maybe they'd prefer to wait til after the
summer...maybe this, maybe that.</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349468">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349467"> Short story shorter, a day
after camp was over, I heard the wonderful news that they had gotten
engaged..... to each other! Someone <i>else</i> had gotten my mitzvah<i>.</i> (And my <i>shadchanus </i>money </span><img alt=";) winking" src="http://mail.yimg.com/ok/u/assets/img/emoticons/emo3.gif" /><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349467">). Because the moment I thought of it, was the moment I should've acted. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1327675418257109">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1327675418257109">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1327675418257106">Y'know, I was always a little bothered by the famous story of Rabbi Akiva, where he traveled away from home for 12 years learning <i>Torah</i>,
and upon returning home, before even entering his home, he
overheard his loving wife, Rachel, speaking to a neighbor inside. "I'm
so proud of my husband's accomplishments in <i id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349525">Torah, </i>I
wouldn't mind if he goes back for another 12 years!"</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1327675418257109">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_1327675418257106">At the echo of
those words, he made an about face, got into his carriage, and traveled
away for an additional 12 years. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349538">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349538">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349537">Couldn't
he just go in and say, "Hello, wife?"</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349538">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349537">Not even, "what's for dinner".</span><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349537"> Just H-E-L-L-O. And then he can turn around and go to resume his
studies. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349538">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349537"><br /></span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349546">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349545">Only now, after studying the concept of <i>b'chipazon</i>, do I understand why he couldn't go in. Because<i> that
</i> was the moment to act. <i>That</i> was the second to go back. It was now or never. If he would have
gone in and seen his wife for even for a second, he may have changed his mind. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349615">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349615">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349614"><i id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349613">B'chipazon. They left in a rush..</i> They had to hurry out of there, because stalling and procrastinating would have brought them down to a lower spiritual level. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349627">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349627">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349626">This can possibly be the reason why they were commanded, at this moment, to eat matzah on <i>Pesach.</i> </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349642">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349626">The two significant aspects that make up matzah are: <i>a time factor,</i><b id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349731"> </b>and <i>constant work. </i>
Consistently kneading the dough, for exactly 18 minutes, qualifies the
matzah kosher. Stopping to knead it, symbolizing laziness, or allowing
it to sit even one minute more than 18... and it's become <i>chametz.</i></span> </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349642">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349642">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349641">Time
is so important, that 100th of a second is worth <b>ten million
dollars. </b>Yup, you heard right.</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1327675418257102">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_1_132767541825799">Ever watch the Olympics? The winner crosses the finish
line at 3:27:53 seconds. So, at the following Olympics, when the next contestant is trying to
beat him, and he's coming in at three seconds... everyone's turning blue in anticipation...and he wins by 3:27:52 seconds! The crowd bursts
into cheer. We have a new winner, who won by 100th of a second. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349656">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349655">What happens the morning after? The new winner gets a phone
call. It's Nike. They want him to model their new sneakers. That's two
million dollars. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349656">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349655">Next, Coca Cola calls him. They want his to be
drinking their stuff on TV. That's another two million. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349656">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349655">And the
phone rings and rings. One hundredth of a second is worth ten million
dollars. </span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349664">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349664">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349663">I think Ill get off the computer now and go beat last week's record in shabbos cooking. Procrastination? Aint nobody got time for that!</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349677">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349676"><br /></span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349677">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349676">Have a beautiful shabbos,</span></span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349677">
<span id="yui_3_2_0_17_1327675415349676" style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa</span></span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-90345848386054572432013-12-20T14:48:00.002-06:002013-12-20T15:08:28.017-06:00Paroah: Pro choice Activist.<div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-3542524895651129599" itemprop="description articleBody">
<div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-3157100243395431558">
<div id="yiv153947342">
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1326400671229105">
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_1326400671229102" style="background-color: white; color: black; font-family: times new roman,new york,times,serif;">
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">We
live in a crazy world, with up-side-down priorities and almost non-existent
values. Not that you need proof of the chaos in the world, but by glancing at the
Sports and Entertainment news over the past few years, we have seen:</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Golf Superstar ... black guy.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Basketball champion... Chinese man.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">#1 rapper... white dude.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">A bit topsy-turvy, ya think? </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> Oh, and then there's the twerking. And the twerker. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">But <i>our </i>messed up galaxy isn't such a novelty<i>.</i>
The fact that it was messed up 3,300 years ago is what's shocking. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Peaking into the corruption of that period can help us understand its source and solution.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">If you pay close attention to the <i>psukim, </i>and if you're not yet immune to strange events, you'll appreciate an interesting discussion between Paraoh and the midwives. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Within those verses, there are a few points which perplexed my brain while reading them.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">1. Instead
of Paraoh commanding his army to go out and kill all newborn baby boys, as would be the normal course of action, he arises all by his royal self, and approaches Yocheved and
Miriam (the midwives) to have them commit to his inhumane demands.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">2. Paraoh
wastes all his bad breath by teaching unique indications to the
midwives, explaining in detail how to differentiate between the boys
and the girls<i>. Rashi </i>spells out for us what those signs were: If the baby's head is facing downward, it's a boy, and face up means a girl.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Now,
wouldn't anyone with an IQ of 70 be deemed capable of
distinguishing between the genders, without helpful tips from His
Royal Highness?</span> </div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">3.
Yocheved and Miriam's response is a bit weird. They claimed that the
situation is out of their control, since the Jewish women are
birthing alone, without their assistance. By the time they
arrive on the scene, the babies are out. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">What kind of reply is that? You don't have to deliver him. As soon as the baby is out, if it's a boy, kill the kid. </span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">4. Throughout the whole dialog, the main character is sometimes called Paraoh, and sometimes <i>melech Mitzraim, the king of Egypt. </i>Is that something significant, or at some point they just forgot his name?</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> The T<i>orah </i>refers to the king as <i>melech Mitzraim </i>in
the beginning of the story since he was trying to act in
the manner of a king. He had to be fair and just and honest. If he indicated that a new law in progress was going to be cruel or
unfair, he worried that the people would revolt. So, approaching the midwives<i> </i>personally as opposed to delegating the job to the army, was his attempt at portraying some semblance of law. </span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">He was covering up his evil scheme in a mantel
of justice: </span> </div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">"There
are too many people in Egypt. We can't feed so many mouths. We don't
have enough mummy garb to go around." </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">He would never explicitly command killing them once they're already born, so he suggested, for demographic
purposes, to murder them before they're actually born. </span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">In more contemporary words, he isn't killing any baby boys; he's commanding forced abortions! He them taught them the head signals (faced up or down) so that <i>before the baby's officially born</i>, if they see it's a boy, they kill him. </span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Paraoh was the first Pro Choice activist. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Roe vs. Wade vs. Paraoh.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">At this point, the midwives<i> </i>start referring to him as Paraoh. With this one simple word, an entire conversation took place, indirectly: </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">"You think you'll fool us<i>? </i>You're no <i>melech Mitzraim. </i>You're <i>Paraoh </i>the murderer. The <i>rasha.</i> Killing the kid before he's born is <i>no different </i>than killing him after. Today you're slaying them in utero.... but tomorrow you'll be slaughtering them alive." </span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Which is exactly what happened.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">By the way, there was no one more appropriate to give Paraoh that mussar shmooze
than Yocheved. She was indicating that she, herself is the proof that
a child pre-birth is the same human being as the child after
birth. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"> When the Jews exiled down to Egypt, they were counted as <i>shivim nafesh, 70 people</i>.
In reality, there were only 69 people traveling to Egypt. What
did they do, round it out to the nearest whole number? </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">No. Yocheved
wasn't born yet, but she was on the way. She was still in the womb, but
nonetheless, was counted as a complete human being. </span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Ever notice how all the people who are pro abortion have already been born? </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Just sayin'. </span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Paraoh
was using a well known strategy to cover up his crime, pretending he was in the right. This game is a tactic many of use to convince ourselves or others that we're doing the right thing when likely, we're not.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>RATIONALIZATION.</b></span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">What is rationalization?</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Rationalization means <b>inventing a good reason/excuse for something, instead of admitting the true reason. </b></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Rationalization is so common, that if we were to stop doing it, the silence would be a foreign language. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">We rationalize to <i>others,</i>
giving excuses or logical explanations as to why we did or didn't do
something, but a<i> lot </i>of rationalizing goes on internally- within
ourselves, often without even realizing we're doing it.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Why do we do this?</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It's a defense mechanism.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Having difficulty admitting a fault or a wrongdoing, we try to cover it up. A
logical sounding reason allows us to hide from the
truth without looking or feeling guilty.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Picture for a second, a typical market place with merchants trying to
sell their goods. There's one man, in a little booth, selling
excuses. "Ladies and gentlemen, excuses for sale! Buy them before
they're used. Hot for now, cold for later. Excuses for sale!!"</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">One
of his neighboring merchants turns to him and says, curiously, that he's been watching him sell excuses for 20 years already, but yet he still has no
money. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">He wanted to know what he's doing wrong.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">"That's the way it is with excuses", the merchant said. "Even if people buy them, they never make you rich".</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_132640067122999">
<br />
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_132640067122996" style="font-size: large;">It has been said that <b>success has many fathers, but failure is an orphan. </b> </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_1_132640067122999">
<span id="yui_3_2_0_1_132640067122996" style="font-size: large;">When I'm successful, I take all the credit for it. I own it. But when I fail, I look around for someone or something to blame it on; a traumatic upbringing, bad luck, and unhappy marriage, bad teachers in
kindergarten, friends, <i>chavrusas</i>, therapists...- anyone but me.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">What's so bad about making excuses?</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The only way to improve a situation, or to have any growth at all, is to recognize that <i>I, by myself,</i> am responsible for my situation.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">If
someone has a temporal problem and is prone to coming late, he can
have all the excuses in the world, and people might actually buy them,
but they'll never 'make him rich'. He'll never own up, so he will be stunted from improvement and growth.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">If we keep blaming others, <b>even if it's legitimate</b> we will never find a solution, and we will forever remain on that level, with that same boring, old weakness.</span></div>
<div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Even if people excuse us with our rationalizations
and we end up fooling them, getting off "free", we can <i>never </i>really get off free. Because our conscience will constantly scold us and make us miserable, since we <i> know</i> it's all just a cover. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">We can run but we can't hide.... from ourselves. Face it, admit it, and improve it.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />
Rationalize? </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Rational Lies</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos,</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa </span></div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
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Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-90279114101949133282013-12-13T11:03:00.002-06:002013-12-13T12:08:39.834-06:00Outside Influence: Friend or Enemy?<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">Every friday night, after
infusing the home with light and sanctifying the mundane, we rise in
testimony to God's omnipotence and kingship, with a glass of wine. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">And then, in many Jewish
homes around the world, parents give a blessing to their children. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">The
blessing for the girls is, that they grow up to follow in the spiritual
footsteps are our matriarchs, Sara, Rivka, Leah, and Rachel. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">The boys
are blessed with this famous <span id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508481" style="font-style: italic;">bracha</span>: <span style="font-style: italic;">Yisimcha Elokim k´Ephraim uch´Menashe...God should sanction you to be like Ephraim and Menashe... </span> </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">Wait. Menashe? Ephraim? What's wrong with a blessing to be like<span style="font-style: italic;"> Avraham, Yitzchok, Yaakov, </span>or any of the other <span id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084744" style="font-style: italic;">shvatim,</span><span id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084744"> whom we just learned so much about?</span> I don´t even know <span style="font-style: italic;">Ephraim </span>and <span style="font-style: italic;">Menashe.</span> What's so extraordinary about them?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">You know what would be nice?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">To have the ability to raise our children in
exactly the way we want them to be raised. Whatever they know would be
just what we taught them, in the way that we taught it to them. That which we want to protect them from,
they would never find out about. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">Clearly, reality forces us out of our fantasy. We live life surrounded by people of all shapes, sizes and colors. We are exposed to more philosophies than we can integrate, and we are encircled by an array of theories and behaviors. Some appealing, some not.</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">No matter how hard we try to shelter ourselves and our kids from the foreign cultures around us, we can't fully escape it. We need to recognize it, accept it, and embrace it.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Menashe and Ephraim, as opposed to their grandparents, became who they were by growing up in Egypt,<span id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084782" style="font-style: italic;"> </span>the home of immodesty, promiscuity,
and everything spiritually ugly. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And yet, they were able to reach a level of spiritual completion adequate enough to be the goal of our aspirations. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">How did they accomplish that?</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Living within a foreign culture actually served as their friend, and not their enemy. They learned to distinguish between good and
bad, and to differentiate between right and wrong. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">They mastered the skill of elevating the positive while rejecting evil. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">This is an art. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<span style="font-size: large;">In order to achieve this, we must be able to make a distinction between good and bad. It is critical that the line be
crystal clear. It's not necessary to shelter ourselves completely; we do not need to
live in caves, afraid to look out at the world. That creates weakness
and inability to deal with differences. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Standing up and facing reality while removing ourselves from its negativities, shows strength,
maturity, and stability.
</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_132578832508440">
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">But, the balance here is pretty tight. How do I know if I´m
accepting too much of the influence of my environment? How can I integrate my surroundings in a spiritually healthy way?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">Preceding the reform movement, Moses Mendelssohn, a Jewish, German philosopher, took the <span id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084793" style="font-style: italic;">Torah, </span>and translated it into German. The Rabbis at the time completely rejected it and put him in <span id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084911" style="font-style: italic;">cherem, excommunication. </span> </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">Years later, in the US, some people at Artscroll took the <span style="font-style: italic;">Torah </span>and translated it into English. This time it was accepted and applauded.</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">What caused the difference in reaction? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Is Rabbi Zlotowitz better looking than Mendelssohn? Wealthier? Smarter?</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">That´s not it.</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">The difference, was their motivation.</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Mendelssohn's intentions were to make the German speaking Jew more
German.</b> </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Artscroll wanted to make the English speaking Jew more Jewish.</b> </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">The proof of the motives are in the results. Following the German translation was the start of the downfall of
Judaism; the Reform movement.</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">Following the English translation was the start of the
uprising of <span style="font-style: italic;">Baalei Tshuva </span>all across the world. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The difference is apparent beyond doubt. Because, as long as we use foreign
culture as a way to enhance our Judaism, we're able to grow from it. When priorities shift and the culture becomes the focus,
that's where the problem begins.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Hashem should bless us all to be like Ephraim and Menashe. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">To embrace the world we live in, instead of fighting it. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">To elevate the good and reject the bad. </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">And, while
living our lives surrounded by outside influence, to be able to keep and follow the <span style="font-style: italic;">Torah </span>as our numero uno priority, always.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">My environment might decide who I am, but *I* decide who I´ll become.</span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
</div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">Have a beautiful shabbos, </span></div>
<div id="yui_3_2_0_30_1325788325084884">
<span style="font-size: large;">Yaffa </span></div>
Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-670946184317294584.post-71439050168975915952013-11-29T11:58:00.001-06:002013-11-29T11:58:41.657-06:00Greek Olympics<span style="font-size: medium;">The disease of Chanuka is Competition. <b><i>I´m only good if I´m better than you.</i></b><br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">The Greeks were the founders of the
Olympics. Their philosophy was that a person is only worth something in
comparison to someone else. Life is all about competing and winning.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Looking the best, acting the best, being the fastest, the smartest, the prettiest. That´s all that matters.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">The Parsha tells us that Yosef had<i> chen, charm.</i>
He had a unique form of beauty and attraction that stood out. Yosef was
also the only person that the Torah has ever referred to as a tzaddik.
This is because he lived alone in Egypt, with no one to compare himself
to. He was just, well, Yosef. <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Humankind often projects women with
flawless skin, big eyes, full lips, small nose, pure white teeth, smooth
and shiny hair, curvy body, wearing size 0 designer clothes, and they
portray them as being happy because of those qualities and possessions.<br />They
portray men as tall, with smooth skin, six packs, perfectly square
jaws, with any woman at their disposal, quite literally at their
disposal, stepping into their luxury car of choice, and they define
that that is what makes a man happy.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Society is extremely successful in being
able to brainwash people into believing they should look a certain way,
act a certain way, or be a certain someone, when in reality every
single one of us is different. People are born to be different; no two of
us are the same. We have different mindsets, different personalities,
different emotional makeups, different intellectual capacities,
different needs, different desires, different backgrounds, different
strengths and weaknesses, different opinions, and different experiences.
Even identical twins are different from one another.<br />There´s only
one way in which we´re all the same: We´re all flawed human beings. We
have defects and flaws that were given to us to improve and perfect, in order to help us each fulfill our own individual missions in
life.<br /><br />Society likes to categorize people with the intention of
causing us to believe that we have fewer rights to be happy because we
do not fit into the idealistic lifestyle. This is the reason that so
many men and women hide away from society, and grow up thinking that
there´s something wrong with them. This is also why a disproportionate
amount of men and women carry the number of their local plastic surgeons
in their back pockets.<br />Comparing ourselves to others is a sure way
to knock our self esteems down to the ground, trample on them, and hose
them down the drain. <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">There will always be those who are
´better´than us, and those who are ´worse´than us. Denying this, and
trying to live the life of the subject of our envy, will cause us to
start wishing we were different people, causing thoughts of
worthlessness and hopelessness.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Here´s the main problem I see evolving
from this. By trying to parallel or match another person, I still come
up short of being them, but at the same time I´m coming up short of
being ME. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">I´m not living <i>their </i>life, and I´m not living <i>my</i> life. So, am I
even living? </span><br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-size: medium;">Breathing doesn´t mean I´m living. It means I´m alive.</span></b><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">There´s an entire world of difference between being alive, and actually
living.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Weighing ourselves against another,
takes us nowhere, wastes a lot of time and energy, and puts us in an
emotionally and psychologically awful place. As Albert Einstein so
wisely quoted, “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its
ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it
is stupid.” <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Contrary to Greek ideology, Judaism
teaches that the result of something is not what´s important, but rather
the effort and motivation put into the act. Pirkei avos explains:<i> ¨L´fum tzaara agra¨ The harder the effort, the greater the reward. </i><br />A
parent who´s interested in teaching their child to be confident and
healthy, will never tell them ¨I´m proud of you because you´re the best
in your class¨, but rather, they´ll tell them ¨I´m proud of you because
you really tried your best¨. <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">We all have intrinsic value as individuals. We´re not only good just in comparison to others.<br />The proof of this is another lesson from our sages: <i>¨Lo Alecha Hamelacha Ligmor¨, It´s not up to you to finish the task. </i>What<i> is </i>up to me is to start it, and to give it my absolute best.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">The Miracle of Chanuka is not just that
we were a tiny army who won over a much more powerful one. It was an
internal war that we won. It was a battle of confidence and assurance.
The Greeks tried to remove everything we stood for; everything that made
us unique:<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><i>Shabbos, kashrus, bris milah, limud Torah, and rosh Chodesh. </i><br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">These are five Mitzvos that are
absolutely unique to the Jewish people. To replace these spiritual
activities, they tried enticing us with their external enterprises
fueled by competition and vanity. But we didn´t fall for it! We stood
up to fight! We fought against a life of externality! We fought against a
life of competition! We fought against a life of emptiness! <br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">And we won.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">So when we celebrate Chanuka, we´re
embracing our uniqueness. We´re recognizing our individuality and
accepting the essence of who we are.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">It´s no coincidence that the main
character of the parsha this week is Yosef, who had reached spiritual
perfection, being the solitary person to earn the title tzaddik. He
achieved that by having no one to compare himself to, and therefore
being able to use his own potential by being true to himself.<br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Chanuka means that the only person I need to be better than, is the person I was yesterday.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;"><br />Have a beautiful shabbos, a happy Chanuka, and a chodesh tov!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Yaffa </span>Yaffahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17268133969970608980noreply@blogger.com0